Page 25 of Collateral Damage

“Hear what?” Jensen asks, sitting up straighter and nearly causing Skyla to tip her margarita all over herself. She stretches her arm out as the slushy liquid sloshes around in the glass, then scoops a finger under the glass to catch the stray drop. She turns to face Jensen, her long dark hair sweeping over her shoulder as she narrows her eyes at him. “Ooh, buddy, you nearly ruined my new coat.”

Behind me, Chris tenses, and his hand goes to his hip before he flexes his fingers when he comes up empty.

Was he going for his gun?

“Hear what, baby?” Jensen asks again, deep in concern as he gazes at his wife. I wonder if it’s always this way for them. If they are always on high alert. I guess it makes sense. I think if I was kidnapped and tortured by a madman, I’d also be expecting the worst at every turn.

“The silence. No crying, no baby monitor static. It’s the sound of total freedom.”

Everyone around the fire, including Jensen, immediately relaxes except for Chris. I can feel the tension in his muscles as he holds me tight around my chest. Slowly, he relaxes his arms and looks calm, but I know better. His eyes sweep Jensen and Skyla’s backyard, and the tension in his jaw, though minimal, is telling. His eyes linger on the jungle gym that Tatum won’t be able to use for a good year or two yet.

“I’ll be back. I’m going for another beer,” he says.

I watch as Chris walks to the trash can at the side of the house, giving every pretense that he’s throwing his empty bottle away, but I know better. Jensen does too because he scoots Skyla forward, then stands up and heads over to Chris. He claps him on the back and says something to him before Chris finally relaxes.

Skyla turns to face me. “God, I really did a number on him, didn’t I?”

I don’t know what to say to that. I didn’t know Chris before he served as Skyla’s protection detail, so I don’t know how he was then versus now.

“Sky, you know that big oaf has always been on high alert. He tried to take my head off the first time I met him,” Tyler interjects from his seat next to me.

“If we know you—and we do—you probably deserved it,” Courtney retorts.

Tyler looks at me. “Well, how do you like that?”

The tension slips away as Courtney and Tyler squabble good naturedly. I continue to stare at Chris, wondering about the side of him I don’t know. There are times I’m sure he’s responding a certain way for a reason, but I don’t know what that reason is.

Skyla’s fingers curling around my hand bring me back to the present. “I’ll never forgive myself for what I did to him.”

“What do you mean? You didn’t do anything to him.”

She chews her lip and takes a hefty drink of her margarita. “Ouch, shit! Brain freeze,” She presses her hand to her forehead and scrunches up her face. “You know, some days it doesn’t seem real.”

She gazes at the fire, and I wonder just how many margaritas she’s had.

“When I think about what went down, I just want to curl in a ball from shame, you know? When I think about cheating on Trent with his brother, it still makes me sick to my stomach.” She looks over at Jensen, who at least has Chris relaxed enough that he’s smiling now. “But then I realize if things hadn’t gone down the way they had, I wouldn’t be with Jensen, and we wouldn’t have Tatum.”

I reach over for her hand. “Sky, you know that wasn’t your fault. You were drugged.”

She shakes her head. “I know we were. The facts are all there, and when I hear them, my head sort of wants to get on board, but then I know what’s inside my heart, and the fact is, the serum was designed to enhance the predominant emotions and when it comes down to it, I’d never stopped loving Jensen. Trent and I loved each other very much, but it was safe and easy. And although I was in love with him, if I’m honest, he was the safe choice.”

I swallow hard, unable to imagine how difficult it must be for Skyla to be this honest. I reach over and squeeze her hand again.

“You can’t blame yourself for what happened.”

She smiles, and it’s a little sad, but when she looks over at Jensen, there’s a light in her eyes that extinguishes the pain. “It all worked out for the best. I just wish things had been different. I not only hurt Trent and Jensen, but I also hurt Tank. Can I ask you something?”

What is it about that question that makes one’s stomach flip? Or maybe it’s just me, but as soon as someone asks me like that, I immediately get nervous.

“Sure, anything.”

“How is Tank with you? I mean, when you’re alone. Is he super protective?”

Okay, so I didn’t expect this. I think about earlier this evening when he pulled his gun because of a spider. “He’s Chris, I guess. Always a little overprotective, but I figured it was part of the job. It has to take its toll, right? Living the life he does. Jensen must be the same, right?”

“Yeah, Jensen is, but that’s because of what we went through together. Has Tank ever talked about what happened?”

I pull my beanie down over my ears. “Not exactly. He’s kinda tight-lipped about that kind of stuff. All I know is what you’ve told me.”

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