Page 90 of Fair Catch
“All I’m asking is that you try,” he said, his brows lifting a bit. “Okay? Can you give me that?”
I nodded, though my throat was still thick with a knot I couldn’t swallow.
“No decisions about the draft or otherwise until after the season is over,” he added, holding up his pinky.
I eyed it with a frown, arching a brow when I looked back at him. “Isn’t that yours and Riley’s thing?”
“Well, now it’s our thing, too. Come on,” he said, wiggling his pinky. “Swear it.”
I shook my head on a sigh, but conceded, wrapping my pinky around his.
“That’s a sacred vow,” Gavin reminded me as he grabbed his bag and headed for the door. “Just so you know.”
“I said I’ll try,” I said, opening the door for him.
“That’s all I’m asking.”
He wheeled out on a cloud of hope, like he’d already won, like he was so certain everything between me and Riley would work out and I’d graduate with a degree and wait until after I’d walked across the stage to enter the draft.
I didn’t have the heart to tell him that try as I might, my shot with Riley was nonexistent.
And if I couldn’t have her, I couldn’t bear to stay here long enough to watch someone else get to.
Just the thought made my fist tighten around the doorknob as I shut the door, and then I sank down into the couch, hating that it still smelled like her, that her long hairs were still in the sink because I couldn’t wash them away, that her hair tie was still around my wrist from when I’d pulled it out of her hair while fucking her against the wall.
She was everywhere, inking herself into my skin like a tattoo.
And maybe that was the hardest truth to face.
Even if I did run, I’d never be able to run far enough to forget her.
Zeke
“I’ll make this short,” Coach Sanders said two weeks later, typing away on his laptop before he turned to face me. He folded his hands together on top of the desk. “You’re going to play in the bowl game.”
I heaved a sigh of relief, fighting back a smile that was too strong to subdue. Just the thought of being back on the field, back under those lights, my jersey proudly sporting my name on the back… it lit me up like nothing else could.
“It’s been tough without you and Novo,” he admitted. “On all of us. Not just for the role you play in the game, but for the role you play on the team as leaders. And I know it was tough on both of you to watch us play in your absence.”
I nodded, swallowing down the knot of guilt that had permanent residence in my throat now. We’d lost both those games, and while I didn’t have a big enough head to assume those losses were because Riley and I weren’t on the field, I couldn’t stop myself from wishing I’d been in there to pull my weight, to try to secure the win.
I knew without asking that Riley felt the same.
“We all wanted the playoffs this year, but this is how football goes. Things change. Players get injured or fail their classes or…” He stopped, waving his hand to fill in the rest. “Whatever. But there’s something I want you to know.”
I sat up a little straighter.
“Zeke, you’ve got more potential than you realize, more than you give yourself credit for. I don’t know everything about you, but I know enough to guess that you don’t speak kindly to yourself in that head of yours.”
Coach gave me a pointed look, and my gaze fell to my lap, unable to meet his.
“In the past couple of weeks, you’ve shown up. You practiced like you were playing, supported your teammates at the games even when you couldn’t be in, and you’ve pulled your grades up in every single class. You rewrote that essay and, I just found out, also a full-page apology that wasn’t required of you.”
I nodded, still unable to look at him.
“You are good, Zeke. Talented. Special.” He tapped the desk with his knuckles until I met his eyes. “But you could be great. You could be so much more than you even realize. You just have to show up.” He lifted his brows. “Understand, son?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Good,” he said, sitting back. “I heard some nonsense that you were thinking about joining the draft.”
I opened my mouth to refute, panic zipping up my spine, but he cut me off.
“Let me just go ahead and tell you right now that’s not happening. This team needs you. And you need us.” He dared me to say something, and when I didn’t, he added, “You owe me ten laps just for thinking it.”
“Yes, sir,” I said, and for some reason…
I smiled.
