Page 12 of Marry Me, Right Now

“Anything really weird. Numbers and dates, or anything that looks like a clue.”

“On it.” She took a big sip of wine, and began reading intently.

I was pleased that her automatic reaction was to get to work. I’ve known many women who would have just left me to it alone, which is why I rarely went on a third date with anyone. I love to spoil women, but everyone needs to pitch in when there is work to be done.

Reading a full page about the correlation between train schedules and duck migration, I moved on to the symbolism of full moons and the stock market.

“Hey,” Mia said, “Does cauliflower mean anything to you?”

I laughed. “Yes. Cauliflower is the harbinger of evil. If you see it on the table, it means that more horrid health food is coming soon, so you should look out and pay close attention.”

She giggled, and went back to reading. It was lovely that we were already fairly comfortable together, which was a good sign for our marriage.

“What does a bird pen mean to you?” she asked, sitting up straighter.

I had to concentrate for a moment. “Seventh birthday card. Hidden gift. Why?”

She showed me the paper which read, “Thirty-seven bird pens”.

“Holy shit.” I turned to page thirty-seven, which described the timing of the allocation of the assets in fine print, with the precision and meticulous detail of an engineering blueprint.

Suddenly I froze. Mia scooted over closer and grabbed my arm. “What is it?”

“I don’t believe it.” I held the paper out to her and pointed. “Please read that line to me and tell me it’s real.”

She followed my finger. “Although the house is traditionally given to the eldest heir, if the younger sibling were married before the eldest turns thirty years of age he would be richer in experience, so older in spirit. Therefore, the younger sibling shall inherit the estate of 37 Bridle Path if their marriage occurs before the thirtieth birthday of the elder.”

Mia looked at me, nearly shaking. “If we get married before George’s thirtieth birthday, you get your uncle’s house, as well as the money?”

I nodded slowly, setting the papers down. “Sneaky bastard.”

“And you said it’s a really nice house?”

I grinned. “It’s a fifteen thousand foot mansion with a cobblestone path down to the ravine, a koi pond, a pool room, and three fireplaces.”

“So that’s what he was hiding from you.” She sounded positively disgusted with George, and rightfully so.

I stared down at my hands for a moment. “I don’t know. Do you think he knew, and was trying to get me to sign to prove that I had the opportunity to see that information? Or did he just skim the folder and want us both to sign to get it over and done with?”

Mia shook her head. “He was hiding it. He knew. I’d bet you twenty bucks, and I never, ever bet more than a nickel.”

She was quiet for a moment while I attempted to process this. Then she softly asked, “When is George’s thirtieth birthday?”

“September thirteenth.”

Her jaw fell open. “That’s less than two weeks away.”

“Yes.”

“So basically you need me to marry you right now.”

“Yes.”

We sat together in silence for a moment. Her manner of being very still was extremely calming. Then I grabbed my phone, pulling up a photo of my uncle’s house, holding it out to her.

“Wow,” she breathed.

I scrolled through, showing her a few pics of the charming kitchen, the grounds, the massive old fashioned fireplaces.

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