Page 51 of Fighting Fate (Granton University 1)

For the first time, she actually wanted to give it. But letting go of the bitter anger toward him scared her, even though she knew she’d already absolved him in her heart over a month ago.

Clinging to her denial like a security blanket, she realized forgiving him would open the floodgate for other emotions to enter, emotions she knew she shouldn’t harbor for Logan Xander.

Needing space from the overly personal conversation they’d started, she backed up and glanced around. They were still at The Squeeze, clocked in and discussing her mother of all things, a topic she’d refused to discuss with anyone.

She shook her head, dazed. “Why did I tell you all that?”

He shrugged. “Because I asked.”

She knew it was more than that. She felt a connection with him. They had both suffered from the same event. They were both scrambling to find a way out of the misery. They were both lost but desperately seeking a purpose.

“Do you know why I came to Granton?” she asked, pretty much out of the blue.

Logan shook his head. “Did you know I was here?”

“No.” She gave him a sad smi

le. “Not at all. It was actually because of Trace. This was his dream school.”

“Oh, God.” Face once again blanching of color, Logan leaned against the opposite counter and swiped a hand over his short crop of hair. “I had no idea.”

“He wanted to get a business administration degree in marketing. So I majored in business administration.” Paige gave a short, harsh laugh. “But the thought of actually taking a business class scares the crap out of me.”

Logan peered at her. “Then why did you—”

“Because I wanted to live his life for him.” Her shoulders lifted and fell in a helpless shrug. “It seemed easier than living my own life. Yet once I got here, I found I could have my own life. And slowly, I started living for me instead of him. It was so strange. At home, everything fell apart around me, and no matter how hard I tried to fix it, it just got worse. But here…here I actually help people. I make a difference. I’m somebody. And I like it.”

Glancing at him to gauge his reaction, she found him profoundly affected. Though he wasn’t technically crying, his eyes looked wet. “That’s…that’s great, Paige,” he whispered as if he was honestly proud of her.

“Yeah.” She wiped her damp palms on her thighs before dropping her next bomb. “I think subconsciously, you and I both came here, to this college, for exactly the same reason. To start over fresh. But if not attending those grief group meetings prevents you from doing that, if it keeps you from your own healing process, I won’t be able to move on quite so well either. I like helping people, and if I do something that purposely blocks you from being helped, it’s going to bother me. A lot. So I really need you to come back to the meetings. Okay?”

The breath shuddered from his lungs before he answered. She knew how big a decision this was for him. But she didn’t back off. She stared at him hard until he nodded.

“Okay,” he said, his voice quiet. “I’ll be there.”

Chapter Eighteen

LOGAN APPROACHED THE CRIMSON ROOM the next Tuesday evening with his nerves on edge. Just because Paige had told him she was fine with him returning to the grief group didn’t mean she honestly was fine with him returning to the grief group. He knew he’d said he was fine plenty of times when he hadn’t been.

But there was only one way to find out the truth. To show up at a meeting. Besides, he’d missed it. A lot. He missed Samantha, and Jamie’s weekly treats, and Kevin’s goofy comments. The members had become his pseudo family these last few years, and he looked forward to seeing them again.

Most of all, he looked forward to seeing her.

He fully realized he had to be the biggest loser on earth, crushing on the most forbidden girl he could possibly dream about. But Paige was so…

She was just so Paige.

She could put her own abhorrence for him aside so they could both move on with their lives. There was something precious about that. He wished he could be more like her.

Smoothing his long sleeves as far down over his wrists as he could get them to go, he paused just before the entrance, working himself up for the big moment. When he felt ready enough to proceed, he blew out cheeks full of air and stepped into the room.

“Oh my God. Logan?”

At Samantha’s astonished cry, Paige lifted her face. She turned slowly from talking to Jamie and watched from across the room as Samantha rushed to him and hugged him hard. Others flocked forward to welcome him back as well, and not one person asked why he’d been absent for so long.

Logan smiled timorously at the hearty greetings and murmured one-word responses to each person who spoke to him.

It struck her then how quiet he was. Not even at work when he had to talk to customers did he speak a lot other than what needed to be said.

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