Page 110 of Fade (Fighting Fate)

I giggled. I could only imagine.

Ryan held Mae out to Amber. “I think she needs you.”

Amber, already laughing, put her hand up to stop him. “Oh no. She’s all yours. They’re the rules. You discover the poop, you change the poop.”

Everyone was now in fits of laughter.

Ryan stood, still holding Mae, but it was clear he was trying to distance himself from the smell. Giving me a withering look, he turned and started toward the stairs. I waited until he was all the way up before I followed. I wanted to make him sweat.

“You should just make him do it,” Amber said, unable to keep the smirk off her face.

“I shudder to think of the mess I’d find up there later.”

Sneaking up the stairs, I peered around the corner into Daniel’s—now Mae’s and my—room. Ryan had Mae on the changing table, his hand on her tummy, while he searched for what he’d need.

“Wipes are in that basket there,” I said, pointing under the table as I walked in.

Giving me a dry look, he reached down with his free hand and grabbed a handful.

I giggled. “It’s okay. You don’t have to change her.”

Shaking the wipes out, he grabbed a diaper and placed it on the table next to Mae. “No, no. I got this. Maybe you can just tell me if I do something wrong.”

Lowering myself onto the edge of the bed, I watched him remove the diaper and carefully wipe her down. He used three times as many wipes as was needed, and took twice as long as it should’ve, but he managed to clean her up okay.

Opening the new diaper, he lifted up her legs and awkwardly slid it beneath her.

“It’s back to front,” I said, trying hard not to laugh.

He frowned and looked at the offending thing before turning it around and sticking the tabs down. “It’s too big,” he said, scowling at the gaping space between the diaper and her stomach.

“Yeah, she’s still a bit too small for those diapers. You have to stick the tabs all the way to the side, over the top of each other.”

“Oh.” Unsticking them, he tried again, this time succeeding. “There. Ta-da!” he said, lifting Mae up and smiling at her. “I told you Uncle Ryan could do it.”

Mae grinned at him.

“You want to go to your momma while I clean this mess up?” he said, passing her to me with a triumphant smile.

I smirked. “Yes, yes, Uncle Ryan is very clever, isn’t he?”

Laying Mae down along the crease between my legs, I let her tiny hand grip my thumb. When Ryan was done cleaning up, he sat on the bed beside me and looked down at her with me.

“She’s beautiful, Amy. So perfect.” Glancing up at me, he took my hand. “And you’re an amazing mom. But I always knew you would be.”

I stilled, feeling the weight of his hand in mine. He’d held my hand before, but this time, together with his words, the tone of his voice, and the look in his eyes, it felt different. More intimate.

I waited, letting each of those things touch me, allowing myself to feel each one and work out how it made me feel.

“Amy . . . ” he said, looking down at our hands. “I know a lot of things have happened over the last year. A lot of horrible things. And I know you’re still trying to figure out how to shape your life around them.” His brow creased as he sifted through his thoughts. “I just want you to know that I’ll always be here for you and Mae. In whatever way you want me to be. I just . . . I don’t want you to ever feel like you’re alone. I’m going to do everything I can to show you that I’m here for you. Okay?”

I knew exactly what he was saying. Exactly what he was offering. And he’d so innocently touched on the one thing that hurt me the most. Loneliness. Knowing someone was there for me was the one thing I missed more than anything.

Giving his hand a little squeeze, I carefully slipped out of his grasp and smiled. “Thank you. That really means a lot to me. More than you could know.”

Ryan nodded, seeming content, then he scooped Mae up into his arms. “Let’s get the little princess back down to her party, then.”

I watched him walk out the door, the word princess ringing in my ears. Swallowing down the rising emotions, I raised my chin and followed him out.

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