Page 14 of Chef's Kiss

“Christian?” I say, interrupting him as he’s explaining something about the olive tree in his backyard.

He turns his body more towards me, facing me straight on and then nods.

“What happened back there before you went back in the building?”

“You mean when I kissed you.”

I smile, my head turning down and away at how quickly he knew exactly what I was talking about and how assuredly he answered me.

“Yeah. That,” I practically giggle.

“That was to let you know you were safe, and that you’re mine from now on.”

“Yours?”

“That’s right,” he says, his gaze narrowing.

“What exactly does that mean?”

“That means you’re mine in every way. You have been since about this time yesterday when I walked into that store. The moment I saw you that was it for me.”

“I’m not sure I can believe it.”

“Do you believe it now,” he says, taking the mug from my hands and slowly bringing his lips to mine again, but this time I can’t hold back. I cup his face and melt into him, the Starbucks and taste of him mixing, the scent of all his fresh, exotic flowers in his backyard swirling in the air, and I swear I’ve died and gone to heaven.

CHAPTER 8

Christian

I pace the room, staring at the clock on the wall which reads just after three in the morning. It’s the second night in a row I’ve barely slept, but here I am, energy shooting through me.

After that kiss in the garden earlier today it took the willpower of a thousand Navy SEAL snipers not to progress things with Charlotte. I just couldn’t. It wouldn’t be right.

I want her to want me when her mind is clear, not in a heightened emotional state like after this morning.

A big part of me, a very big part, wants to release this pent up pain in my shorts that I’m trying to lounge in, although there’s nothing loungey about my racing pulse and the way I’m strumming my fingertips across the side of my leg.

I’ve never felt as much like a protector as I do right now. Having her here under my roof, sleeping peacefully and knowing no one can ever harm her again makes me feel like a real man. Her man. The only man for her.

Tomorrow I’m going to take her to work and show her just how much alike we are, how my passions are her passions…and when we get home I’ll show her just how passionate I am about her. Always.

CHAPTER 9

Charlotte

I lie in bed, tossing and turning wondering why Christian didn’t take things further after our kiss in the garden this morning. He had all day but he held back, and now I know the real truth.

He’s a great guy, as I thought. But as I suspected, he’s just not interested in me. I’m not sure if I’m embarrassed we kissed, twice, or grateful that we did.

I think back to all those times I tried to pleasure myself to completion to the thought of him, but couldn’t ever quite get there. Now here I am under his roof, in a bed in his palatial estate without my clothes on and the urge to touch myself isn’t there. Not now that we’ve been so close, and I know he’s ready to back away.

It doesn’t make sense though. I felt like we bonded all day over our conversations about how much we both love cooking and losing a parent to cancer. Maybe that was the mood killer right there. And maybe he just finally figured me out for who I am…boring.

It’s not me feeling sorry for myself, it’s just reality. I work. I go home. I read. Eventually I pass out with a faceplant right into my Kindle screen. And I do this over and over and over again, mixing in a lot of time sitting with my dad, but that’s not to be anymore.

He’s a TV show presenter, and he knows how to talk to people, how to say what I want to hear and ask me the right questions. Too bad I’m never going to get that fantasy question from him, or any man, anytime soon.

But there never was any other men I wanted, just him. And as ridiculous as it sounds, I really thought we had chemistry…if we only just met.

And then we did, and we did.

But now this. This purgatory, that I don’t want to be a part of.

I’ll honor my word and go with him to work tomorrow, and I appreciate what he’s done for me to this point and how he’s allowed me to spend tonight in his house, versus being at my house, scared and alone.

But after tomorrow’s show I have to look for a new job, and get my life together…because clearly our lives aren’t coming together anytime soon.

Strangely with that realization and acceptance I drift off to sleep, just trying to enjoy this one night in an amazing California King bed with the pillow top mattress. My dreams were answered today in every way I could have wished for, except one.

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