Page 62 of Tarnished Gold (Landry 5)

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you were here," she flared at me, looking red and very

angry. "That was our bargain. Why do you think I've

been going through all this discomfort and pain?" "Pain? What pain?" Mama asked.

"Pain! Pain! I'm supposed to be the one giving

birth. I can't be without aches and pains, can I? When

you pretend as well and as accurately as I have

pretended, you actually feel it. No one knows how

much I've endured," she cried, her face in an ugly

grimace. "I'm the one who's making all the sacrifices

here just to make everything look right." She put her

hands through her hair, looking as though she might

tug out strands of it, and turned on Octavious, who

stood by, watching with fear and amazement on his

face, too. "Why are you still here? Get rid of them!

Now! All of this is your fault. All of it!"

"All right, all right," he said, holding up his

hands. "Calm down. I'll do it."

He ran from the room. I turned away so no one

would see my tear-filled eyes. I shouldn't have looked

out that window and I shouldn't have laughed and

shown myself to Henry. Because of me, Henry and his

family would be thrown out and have to go searching

for a new place to live and work.

It seemed like anything and everything I did

now would hurt someone. Was it because I had been

touched by evil, deeply stained in my very soul?

Perhaps no act, no matter how unselfish, could

cleanse me of the pollution. Maybe I was better off

staying away from the people I loved, I thought sadly.

Look at what I had done to this innocent, handicapped

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