Page 45 of Bending Under Pressure

I can do that. It’s all I intended to do. I nod and lean in to kiss her again. We stay like that for a while. Our lips melding together fast and then slow before picking back up again. Soft then hard. It’s like my entire body is electrified when Haley gets as wrapped up in us as I am and releases a quiet, but throaty moan. My lips leave hers to explore. I travel down her jaw and then down

her neck. When I place an open-mouthed kiss to the crook of her neck, Haley’s hands move to my chest.

“Keelan.”

My name.

One word.

Two syllables that echo desire and desperation; but it is also a plea.

I move to sit up, pulling her with me. She gives me a halfhearted, almost apologetic smile with her swollen well-kissed lips.

“I need space. Air. Coolness.” She grabs her drink and gulps it down, finishing it off. “Sorry.”

“No reason to be,” I tell her honestly. The room is beginning to glow with the light from the TV as it darkens outside. I run my hand through the hair at the back of her head, smoothing it out since it is a bit frazzled looking. Seeing the clock on the wall behind her, I notice the time. “I need to get you home.”

She nods. Her shoulders relax a little more like she’s relieved. Dang. Did I push her too much? Was it too much for her, us lying like that? Did I mess up when I allowed my mouth to venture away from hers?

“I’m sorry, Hales. I didn’t mean to...” my voice trails off because I’m not sure exactly how I made her feel, only that it’s not good.

Her eyes widen. “Oh. No. It’s not that exactly.” Heat begins to flush her cheeks.

“Then what?” I ask softly. I don’t want to make the same mistake twice.

“It’s...it’s just...overwhelming.”

Now that I understand. However, I run toward it while she shies away from it. I nod in understanding. Suddenly, I remember Haley’s comment about how my mom taught me well, with my manners and behavior. She would be disappointed to know I pushed Haley a bit too far, far enough that she was overwhelmed and relieved that she was getting a break from me.

Wordlessly, I stand and hold out my hand. We don’t say anything as we go the short distance to her house. I feel so bad. So guilty. I park, walk around to open the door for her, but then close it and lean against it, wrapping my arms around her shoulders. Haley leans into me. When she rests her forehead against my chest and snakes her arms around my waist, I feel some relief.

I can’t mess up with her.

I can’t lose her.

She says she was overwhelmed, but on some level, she was uncomfortable, too.

“I’m sorry, Hales,” I repeat in a whisper as I dip my head closer to hers. “You should’ve said it wasn’t okay.” I’m certain that was the mistake. Lying down with her. It made her feel pressured because my body was against hers. I’m a total dick.

“It was okay,” she speaks into my chest. “When you kissed my neck,” I feel a shiver run through her, “it was too much. Don’t feel bad.” She tilts her head back to look at me. “When I let you know I needed to stop, we did. You pulled away. There’s nothing to feel bad about.” I nod. The porch light flickers behind me. Haley laughs. “That woman, I swear,” she mutters, but she’s smiling. “Midnight, right?”

“I’ll text you when I’m leaving my house.”

So, I walk her to her door, kiss her cheek, and retreat to my car. About an hour after I get home, Cam comes into my room.

“Bad news about tonight,” he says, sitting down in his usual chair.

“Finn was at Dead Man’s Curve and said there was a cop circling the road. Thirty minutes later, one of his friends went down there, and he was still close by. We don’t need to go tonight.”

“A cop? Seriously? They’re never around.”

Cameron shakes his head. “I don’t know what’s up with it. You think old man Robinson complained?”

Mr. Robinson lives at the beginning of Dead Man’s Curve on the road adjacent to it in one of the few houses fairly close to the road. He could sit on his front porch and watch us take off if he wanted.

“I doubt it. We’ve been doing it for a year. Why complain now?”

“Maybe it’s just a fluke then. We’ll need to be on the lookout for the next few weeks though. Maybe switch up the nights again. Or lay low.” When the races first started for us, we alternated on different nights of the week because we were terrified of making one night a routine and getting caught. Plus, it’s a lot easier to be out late on the weekends or sneak out then than during the week.

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