Page 2 of Light in the Dark (Heaven and Hell Duet 2)

FC twists.

“Take the rest of the day off. We’ve got it covered here.”

“Are you sure?”

I lift my head in time to see a man standing near where I ran out nod.

“That’s my boss, Brent. His wife is Jamie. Will you meet me at my apartment? I need to grab his stuff and then I’ll be ready to go.”

“Are you with Lila?” I blurt out.

FC’s face turns to stone. “No. Haven’t been since that Christmas before I came to see you last.”

I relax at hearing that. “I’ll meet you there.”

Fifteen minutes later, FC and I walk into his apartment. His son rests his head on FC’s shoulder, his eyelids heavy.

“What’s his name?” I ask.

FC’s cheeks actually redden a little. “Sawyer Nash Hart.” He walks over to his couch and sits down, patting the spot next to him.

“You…you used my names.” I take a seat and angle toward him, unsure how I feel about this.

“I feel like I should apologize, but I saw those names and they were it for me.” He rocks side to side a little, slowly rocking his son to sleep. “That night I left you? The last time I saw you? Lila went into labor. He wasn’t due until March, but he came into the world perfect and beautiful anyway,” he says, glancing down at Sawyer. “The moment I got full custody of him, I moved back to Raleigh and once I was settled in here with him, I sent you the note with my name on it.”

“So, he’s what you were keeping from me? How did you end up with full custody? Did Lila move here too?” There are so many questions and he can’t answer them soon enough.

“Not entirely,” FC says, looking back up at me. He sighs and leans his head back, looking up at the ceiling. “All those bruises I had? When my back was hurt? They were from Lila. She would hit me. That’s what I didn’t want to tell you. I only told my parents when I found out she was pregnant.” And I continue to listen as FC tells me the horrors of his relationship with Lila. How she abused him. How she essentially got pregnant on purpose. How she kept tempting him to relapse. How she used a damn whip to beat him. And then, he tells me how she was once Sawyer was born and how she suddenly gave up her rights.

“I haven’t let my guard down yet,” he tells me. “She wouldn’t do that for nothing, Idaline, and I’m sure she’ll come after me and Sawyer at some point. That’s everything I didn’t want to tell you. It’s embarrassing and I felt like it would be easier to explain once I was out of the situation than while I was still in it. And I didn’t want you worrying about me either. I’m sorry, Idaline, I really am, but that’s the only way I could handle it.”

“Why didn’t you leave her?” I ask.

“Once she was pregnant, I didn’t feel like I could. I didn’t trust her to take care of Sawyer or herself. She even smoked a few times because she knew I went to see you and that was her way of getting me to do what she wanted. Before that, I was too embarrassed and ashamed.”

This is so much information to process. “And what do you want now that I’m here? What were you expecting?”

“Us to be together,” he replies simply. “If that’s what you want.”

My eyes drift to the little boy, who sleeps soundly now. I’d love nothing more than to be with FC, but he’s asking so much of me. I wasn’t expecting a one-year-old. That’s a lot to add on to a potential relationship, and I’m not sure if I can handle it, or if I’m prepared for it.

“It’s a lot to ask, I know,” he says, echoing my thoughts, “and I don’t expect an answer anytime soon. But you’re all caught up on my life now; you can make whichever decision is best for you.” He takes a deep breath. “What’s been going on with you? You disappeared on me.”

“It’s been a bad time with my anxiety,” I answer. “I waited until I was in a better place to come see you. You really fucked with my head, FC.” He frowns, but I push through. “You had this big secret and you ran out on me the morning after we first had sex. Everything kept getting worse and worse in my head and my anxiety had a field day. It took me forever to get myself back to as normal as can be. And now,” I shake my head, “I never could’ve imagined this.”

“Idaline,” he says in his soft, heartbreaking tone like I’ve crushed his soul. “Come here,” he whispers. FC lifts his arm and I snuggle against his side, but that causes his son to take up most of my line of vision. “We’re soulmates, remember? We’ll get this all worked out.”

“I don’t know if it’ll be that simple, FC.”

“It never is, love. Nothing about us has been simple; I don’t expect any different now that there’s a potential for us to be together.” He kisses my head. “Why don’t you relax here for a bit? I’m going to lay him down and take a shower, get cleaned up. How long are you here for?”

I sit up and shrug. “I wasn’t really expecting to come today. I just packed a bunch of clothes and told my work I needed to take off for a while.” I leave out the part where they fired me because it was so last-minute. They threatened to do it, but I didn’t care anymore. Coming here was exactly what I needed to do. I’ll worry about everything else later.

“Will you stay tonight?” he asks hopefully.

I nod. It’s a long drive back home and I’m not ready to leave yet.

FC gets up and disappears on me to do as he planned: laying Sawyer down and to take his shower. My mind is a whirlwind while he’s gone, never focusing on one thing for too long. How could all those things happen to him and I not connect the dots? How did I not realize he was being abused? How difficult it must have been to keep that to himself. And then to add a baby to the mix? I can’t imagine.

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