Page 52 of Driving Me Mad (Sanity 1)

“She didn’t know; I never told her.”

“But you were married to her.”

“I know.” I nod.

“I don’t understand, Trace. Your dad doesn’t know, and neither does your ex-wife. Why? Who does know?” She sets the pizza cutter down and faces me, folding her arms over her chest.

“My doctors and you.” I sigh as I prepare myself to continue talking. “When Faith met me, it was a good time for me, so I avoided telling her. Once things got bad, like they always do, I didn’t want to tell her because I knew it would be a complete surprise and I didn’t think she’d be able to handle it. Be able to handle me like that. I did my best to hide it from her or avoid talking about what was going on with me.”

“Why can you tell me, but not them? I get not wanting to tell every single person you meet, but these are people you’re close to, or were close to. If you couldn’t be honest with them, how can you be honest with me? Are you being honest with me?” Her eyes search mine, trying to find the answer, and I hate that I transformed her from a good mood to one where she’s now concerned about what I’ve been doing.

I reach out to grab her hand and pull her against me. In a low voice, I tell her, “I’m a work in progress, Britt. We both are; you’re just farther along than I am.”

She squeezes her arms around my waist. “I don’t want to be left in the dark, Trace.”

“Okay.” Not a promise, but not a refusal either.

“Well, we should eat, and make sure you get some rest.” Brittany pulls away from me to finish cutting the pizza.

I need to do better. Brittany doesn’t deserve anything less.

“Are you sure about this?” Brittany asks as she squeezes her wrist.

“Yeah. Don’t you want to meet Lily?”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to meet your ex-wife. Won’t it be awkward?”

I laugh. “It’ll be better than what it was like to meet my dad, I’m sure.”

My laughter makes her frown, or maybe it’s the memory of meeting my dad. I grab the hand clutching her wrist and interlock our fingers.

“Aren’t you nervous?” she asks before I can say something to relax her.

“It’s just Faith.” Why would I be nervous? It’s not like I still have feelings for her. I’ve moved on; she’s moved on. There’s no reason to be anxious about seeing her.

“It’s just Faith,” Brittany mocks in a deepish voice with the roll of her eyes.

“Why are you nervous, Britt?” I ask seriously in a gentle tone, searching her expression for an answer.

“It’s the whole ex-wife, new girlfriend scenario. It’s awkward.”

“It’ll be fine. She’ll stay long enough to drop off Lily, bring in her things, and say goodbye to her. It’ll be fine,” I repeat. Finally, she nods and seems to relax a little. I kiss her forehead before leaving for the restroom. When I come back, I want to wince at the bad timing. Faith has arrived and poor Brittany had to answer the door.

At least, she seems relaxed as she pets Lily, and there’s a man with Faith. Looks like she brought her boyfriend. That has to make Brittany feel better.

“Hey,” I say as I walk closer. Lily runs over and jumps up, causing me to laugh. “Hey, girl.” I rub behind her ears and she sniffs my shirt. “Down.” She gets down and walks next to me.

“Thanks so much, Trace,” Faith says.

“No problem.”

“This is Peter, my boyfriend,” she introduces.

He holds his hand out and I shake it. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too. Thanks for being able to take Lily.”

?

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