Page 44 of You Before Me

“If you liked that, maybe we can make a trip to Raleigh. They have a large museum up there that I'd love to see,” Gabe tells me with a hint of excitement. He really does love this stuff, and I never would have thought that.

“Yeah, sure. That sounds like fun.”

After we've ordered, a seriousness settles over us. I don't particularly like it or want it to be this way. Not today anyhow. Gabe has one hand under the table, his fingers dancing over my knee.

“Are you still going to major in French?”

Withholding a groan, I shrug. “I'm not sure if I want to do that anymore. There's too many choices. It's impossible to decide, Gabe.?

?? He gives me a stern, disapproving look, and I feel the need to continue. “French was a rash decision anyway. I made it within a couple days. You would think that after a year of college, I would have more of an idea, but I don't.”

“Ryan,” Gabe interrupts before I keep going on and on. “Major in French.” His tone is authoritative like when we're having sex.

“But what if I hate it? Or what if I'm terrible at it?”

“You have to do it in order to know either of those things.”

True. He has a point. “Why don't we talk about you?”

It slightly irritates me when he grins and says, “Let's talk away. What do you want to know or discuss?”

I narrow my eyes at him, taking a sip of my iced water because this place doesn't have any Sunkist. After thinking about it for a bit, I know just the thing. “Fine. Tell me what your mother was talking about last night when she said you overlook key signs that cause you to get hurt.”

Gabe loses his smile, and I regret asking him before he even answers. The waiter brings us our dishes. It's not until we've started eating that Gabe tells me. “I sometimes have more faith in people than they deserve. I give them chances they shouldn't have. Because of that, I consequently ignore signs that show they will hurt me in the end. That's all.”

He seems awfully vague, so I decide to let it go. “Did you play any other sports besides football when you were growing up?”

“Yeah, I played baseball too.”

Mm. I could just picture him in a baseball uniform. It's even hotter than the football picture on his mantel. Wonder where that picture is because I want to see it. He's got the perfect ass for those pants.

“Do you ever wish you hadn't quit tennis?” He asks.

“No.” I shake my head. “It was too much pressure.”

“But what if the pressure wasn't there anymore? Would you play again?”

“I'm probably not that great now. It's been so long.” Why is he asking me this? “I've done a little bit of everything, remember? Tennis, softball, gymnastics, track, swimming, piano, violin, choir, Spanish, dance, theater; you name it, I've probably tried it. Even took a kickboxing class once, but that was too boyish for my parents to handle.”

Gabe's mouth hangs open slightly. “You weren't exaggerating. Wow.” He sits back in his seat, simmering on what I said. “And you didn't love any of them?”

I shake my head. “Not really. They all had interesting tidbits that I enjoyed, but to say I loved it? Learning Spanish was probably the closest to that.” Talking about this is bringing me down. All it's doing is making me realize how much I lack passion for any one thing in this world.

The waiter brings the check and once Gabe has paid, we leave. I brought my things with me, so Gabe could drop me off at home since he has to head into work. The ride is oddly silent, but Gabe speaks once we pull into the parking lot of my apartment complex.

“Don't worry so much about it, Ryan. You'll find that one thing that makes you tick. Promise.”

I give him a half smile. “Thanks. I had fun, so thanks for that too.”

“I'll see you sometime. I'm going to be working a lot the next couple weeks, especially with Halloween, so I'm not sure when I'll be able to see you again.”

“Don't work too hard, Gabe. Later.” I lean over the console, give him a lingering kiss, and then head up to my place.

I've got a lot of homework to do, and I need to make a decision on my Halloween costume.

Chapter Nine

Gabe

---