Page 27 of You Before Me

“Hey, Ryan.”

“Hey. How's your day been, Officer?” I smirk. Now that I'm not in any kind of trouble, he looks delicious in uniform. I can appreciate it so much more.

Gabe laughs, his large, wide torso rumbling from deep within his chest. “Smooth, considering that I get to take time to have lunch with you. I've been learning how to operate with a new partner. It's hard when you've been by yourself for a while. How's your day been?”

“Good. Just left my last class for today.” I pause about to ask about his partner, as the waitress comes with our drinks. Looks like Gabe already ordered that for us. My grin is too big when the glass full of my favorite orange drink is placed in front of me. “You sure do know the way to my heart,” I chuckle before taking a sip.

Gabe smiles. “I thought you would appreciate that.”

“I do.”

“Good. I'm happy I was able to see you today.” For some reason, that makes me suspicious. I narrow my eyes at him, and he laughs, holding his hands up. “I mean, I have wanted to see you again.”

“But,” I insert for him.

“But I sort of have bad news about this weekend.”

My shoulders sag, the pit of my stomach telling me that he's changed his mind about me meeting the men of his family. I can't say that I blame him. It's early, and I don't even know if we are dating or what we are exactly. There's something between us. Maybe.

“Stop thinking.”

“What?” I ask, confused.

“You think too much, Ryan. It's nothing bad, I promise. It's just I'm not going to be able to work out our lesson as I originally hoped.”

“What do you mean?”

His hands disappear underneath the table and by the motions of his arms, I know he's running his hands down his thighs. “We can still do it, but the new plan is that we go early, I teach you, and then you'll know the basics, even shoot for a good little bit by the time everyone else shows up. If it makes you uncomfortable or scares you too much or whatever and you want to go home, I'll still take you back. You could just hang out with us too. They won't mind.”

To avoid speaking too soon, I skim over the menu, looking, but not paying attention. I was honest when I said that I was kind of excited about it, but it was a feeling full of nerves. It would be trying something new, and I have complete faith in Gabe.

“Will you quit looking at that menu? Just because you're avoiding my gaze, doesn't mean I'm not here anymore. Tell me what you want to do, Ryan,” he says gently. “This is your decision, and we'll do it the way you want.”

“That sounds dirty,” I tell him. He chuckles, but waits for me to continue. I hate when he does that. It's hard to avoid answering when he's so obviously waiting for me to speak. “If you're certain about this and you're sure they won't mind, then yes. That's fine.”

“I'm absolutely certain.”

Scary pulses of anxiety move through me at both meeting people in his family and at what we'll be doing. These types of emotions, I'm not used to, so I shove them aside and focus on picking something for lunch as the waitress returns. We both order a sandwich, his a burger, mine chicken. I shift in my seat, trying to gain a sense of comfort somehow, and my knee brushes one of Gabe's. His eyes flick to me, and I smile.

“What time are we thinking for Saturday?” I ask.

“We get together around two, so we could be out there before one sometime? That gives us at least an hour to see how you do.”

> I nod. “What should I wear?” I don't know much about this, so I wouldn't know if anything special is required. My question sounds weird, even on my lips, but Gabe doesn't acknowledge it.

“Tennis shoes, jeans, shirt, bra, underwear, socks.” He grins at his additional obvious answers, and the massive urge to kiss him runs me down like a freight train. He looks outrageously adorable right now, even with the badge and uniform. I wonder if I'll get a kiss before I leave.

Rolling my eyes, I laugh softly. “Who put you in such a good mood, Officer O'Connor?”

“You did,” he says simply. So casually thrown into the air between us that my glass comes to a stop just as my elbow bends to bring it to my lips.

My face contorts into confusion. Me? As in Ryan? Don't get me wrong, I know there is a person, a real person underneath all of the boys, sex, and dirty comments that I like, but never have I ever considered that anyone would truly like her. I don't like her myself half the time. Why would anyone else? That girl feels too much, cares even more about my parents, and seems weak to me. Broken by the two people who are supposed to love her unconditionally. This girl that I am right now, hasn't made sexual advances towards Gabe, so he isn't talking about me as I am this moment. He's talking about her. The other me.

His lips part, but the waitress brings our lunch, interrupting him. When she walks away, neither of us touches our food. Gabe tilts his head, briefly waiting to see if I'll say something. I clear my throat first.

“I did?”

Gabe nods. “You.”

---