Page 19 of Bad Girls Don't Marry Marines (Rock Canyon, Idaho 3)

What did she want? She had told herself over and over that getting serious with anyone was going to bring up old wounds and introduce new ones. That’s what happened when you let other people in.

Which is why you have only your dad and your sisters, and your best friend from high school who moved across the country.

Did she push people away? That’s what Cole had told her, that he could have gotten over the infertility thing if she hadn’t been such a cold bitch, pushing him out of her life and their bed.

God knew she’d never really loved Cole, but they’d been happy sometimes, hadn’t they?

In the shower, Val shook her head under the water.

She’d married a man she hadn’t loved to please her father and it hadn’t worked out. Big shocker. She should have been a stronger person instead of letting her daddy issues get the best of her.

Her sister talked about love and the one like they were absolutes, and sure, Val had seen people in love before, but she’d never experienced it. She’d felt excitement. Lust. Even affection and caring. But never had a guy been able to work his way so far inside her mind and heart that there’d been nothing else but him.

Maybe she was more like her father than she thought. It was hard to believe he loved anyone, even his daughters. He’d married the right wife, who had given him three children before her death, but he’d never once said the words “I love you” to anyone. Not even her mother, who had been so lovely and childlike. Her mother had never missed a chance to play and be silly with them.

She smiled, remembering their “big hat teas.” Every Sunday after church, they’d headed over to the coffee shop in town wearing large, floral hats and flouncy dresses and ordered tea and cookies. Even when their mother had been pregnant with Ellie and experiencing severe morning sickness, she’d taken them.

It was during that pregnancy that the doctors had found the murmur in her heart, but they hadn’t been concerned. They’d said she could live her whole life with it and have no issues.

But they had been wrong.

Her beautiful, vivacious mother had been chasing them in the backyard on a bright, sunny day, and just before she’d tapped Caroline’s arm to tag her, she’d crumpled to the ground. Not moving. Not breathing.

Val shut her eyes, trying to think of anything else. She could still hear Ellie’s cries and Caroline screaming at her to grab the phone. After that, everything blurred together. Still, the sounds of her sisters’ voices raised in panic haunted her. When their father had arrived home, he’d told her he’d been impressed by her poise through it all.

Val hadn’

t been calm, though. She’d been screaming internally the entire time, wishing she could release the wails of sadness her sisters had had no problem voicing, but she couldn’t.

She’d loved her mother more than anyone else in the world, but even at the funeral, she had just sat there, frozen, unable to release her grief, locked up inside herself.

And it had made her an angry, bitter girl.

She couldn’t count the times she’d ended up in detention for smarting off to one of her teachers, although the suspensions had been far less common. Ben Meyers, her best friend and first boyfriend, had nicknamed her Taz, short for Tasmanian devil, because she was small and fast in a fight and won more than she lost. Ben and his friends had respected her and often covered for her, which was the only reason she was never expelled.

Ben had been her first everything, and he had told her he’d loved her over and over. But before sophomore year, his dad had taken a job in North Carolina, and a few months later, Caroline had left. Val was alone until she’d met Justin, with whom she’d shared one incredible night, only to be shipped off herself the next day.

Turning off the water, Val thought how that might be the reason she liked animals better than people. Animals didn’t expect too much from their owners. Food, water, and some affection and they were satisfied. Low maintenance and expectations. Eventually, they died, but that was less painful than someone promising to be there for you and then leaving.

Although it hadn’t been her mother’s fault, her death had left Val feeling abandoned. Her best friend and sister had also left her behind. It all seemed like a pattern in her life. Even her divorce had proven her theory. Close relationships never worked out and almost always left you with invisible scars that never healed.

Chapter Five

* * *

JUSTIN DROVE OVER to the radio station to pick up his tickets, singing along to Justin Moore’s “Redneck Side.” He couldn’t keep the shit-eating grin off his face as he thought about his kiss with Valerie last night. It had taken him back to that night.

He had been home on leave, just needing to blow off a little steam, but when he’d seen her, it was like something else had taken over—this uncontrollable need to hold her, feel her, and find out who she was. It was insane, he knew that now, but at the time, he’d had to kiss her, and when she’d melted into him, he had lost all rational thought.

Without even knowing her name, he’d helped her into his dad’s truck, and she’d slid right over next to him like she’d been there a hundred times before. When he’d put his arm around her, her slight form had felt . . . right.

“Do you always kiss strange girls you just met?”

Her tone had been teasing, and he’d glanced down at her as he backed the truck up.

“Not usually.”

“Hmmm.”

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