Page 52 of Valor on the Move
“Rafa, I know it feels—”
“No!” Rage sliced through him, icy hot. “You don’t know anything about how I feel.” He hung up and gripped the wheel.
The miles ticked by, and the Suburban stayed behind him. No other Secret Service vehicles appeared, at least. The gray clouds darkened, and rain splattered the windshield. Rafa had no idea where he was going, but he kept driving on to West Virginia as the afternoon waned. He knew he should turn around and get back to the White House—go “home,” what a joke—but he couldn’t bear having to talk to his family again. At least in his car he was alone. As alone as he could get until January.
His phone buzzed every so often, Chris, Adriana, Matty, and their parents all trying him. Finally he turned it off. Even if it wasn’t fair, and even if it was selfish and childish, he ached with betrayal. They’d known. Maybe not for certain, but still. They’d let him pretend. They’d let him hide away who he really was, keeping it locked up, not letting anyone but Ashleigh see. No one but Shane. He felt unbearably foolish and hurt.
It was politics, dear.
He took the next exit, not knowing where he was. The rain poured now, but he kept going through the forest and eventually along a side road that started to wind up into the hills. A car passed the other way, its lights glittering in the rain, but the road was deserted as he approached a lookout and rest stop. The urge to pee had become too much to ignore. He pulled over, screeching to a stop, the tires sliding in the wet ground.
The rain was a curtain over the hills, the world gray and murky as the sun set in the west. As he stepped out, Rafa tipped his head back, letting the water flow over him, not caring as he got soaked. Then the Suburban pulled in behind him, and he hurried to the squat brick bathroom.
Inside, florescent lights flickered over the dank concrete. Opposite a row of urinals there were two stalls, and Rafa locked himself in one just as Shane appeared. Leaning back against the door, Rafa squeezed his eyes shut. “Go away.”
“I just want to make sure you’re all right.” Shane’s voice was low and steady as always.
It sent traitorous warmth through Rafa, and he shoved it away. “Can’t I piss in private anymore?” He yanked open his chinos and pulled out his dick, punctuating his question with a stream of urine into the toilet. Shane didn’t answer, and when Rafa was finished he stood there, his chest rising and falling.
“Are you done?” Shane asked quietly.
“No.” Rafa knew he was being petulant and stubborn, but it was almost as if he was outside himself, and the mess of his emotions had taken over. “Jesus, I want to be alone. Can’t you understand that? Maybe I want to, to…to jerk off! Just go.”
“We both know you’re not going to do that.” Shane was still infuriatingly calm.
“Oh, yeah?” Rafa shoved his open pants and boxers down to his hips and gripped his cock.
Shane sighed. “Come on. You wouldn’t.”
“You don’t think so?” Screw him. Screw them all.
Leaning back against the stall door, Rafa spread his legs and stroked roughly, the slapping sound of his flesh echoing off the concrete and metal. “Maybe I’m sick of being the good boy who does everything he’s supposed to. Who jumps through their hoops and always smiles when he feels like screaming. Fuck it. What has that gotten me, huh?” He spit into his palm once, twice, and slicked the way as he lengthened and swelled. His breath caught on a gasp as he teased the ridge under his shaft, and then words were pouring out and he was powerless to stop them, a distant part of him watching in horror as the rest of him went all in.
“I wish it was you, you know. I wish you were touching me. Fucking me. I know I shouldn’t. I know it’s wrong, but I want it so bad. I want to get on my hands and knees and take you inside me. Want you to pound my ass so I’ll feel it tomorrow.” He moaned softly as his cock throbbed in his grasp.
Shane didn’t make a sound, but Rafa knew he was still there. He could feel it like fireflies dancing in the air, everything buzzing around him. “I’ve dreamed about what you look like naked. Are you hairy? I bet you are. Bet it would feel so good against my skin. Rough. You’d be on top of me, and I’d do anything you wanted. Anything you asked.” He was getting close, his balls tingling as he jerked himself in a shaky rhythm. “I want you to show me what it’s like. I want you to show me everything.”
