Page 85 of The Holiday Ex-Files

My hands flew to my mouth. She still had five weeks until her due date. “I can take Luna for you and watch the boys, whatever you need me to do.”

He let out a heavy breath, wisps of vapor playing in the cold air. “I have it covered. I just need you to get in the truck so I can take you home,” he snapped.

That was it, the piercing blow. He was done with me. I could hardly blame him. Yet, I was stunned by the sting of it all. I stepped back, hoping he wouldn’t see the misty sheen in my eyes. “You should go. I’ll call Mara for a ride.”

For a split second, regret lined his features, but exasperation took over. “If that’s what you want,” he sighed.

“I think it’s for the best. Please tell Shanna and Adonis they are in my prayers. And if it’s not too much trouble, please keep me posted about the babies.” My voice hitched unnaturally. There was a lump in my throat the size of Mars.

Noah only nodded and rolled up his window. With that he took off, leaving me standing there feeling more alone than I had ever felt, and that was saying something. The tears I had been holding back softly trickled down my face. I pathetically stood in the parking lot for several minutes, crying, not having a clue what to do. All I kept asking myself was, how did I just let one of the best people I know walk out of my life? The answer didn’t come right away, even as the snow began to land on my cold, red cheeks. Though I was freezing, I couldn’t move. I had to know. Then the cold hard truth hit me.

Because you don’t own your life. Miss Sparkly haunted me with Noah’s words.

I felt as if I had been trying. But obviously not hard enough.

That was going to change.

~*~

I shoved a huge spoonful of peppermint ice cream in my mouth while I blubbered, “He just left me there. I mean, I told him to, but he didn’t even hesitate.”

Mara made circular motions on my back with her hand, while I hovered over the large bowl of ice cream like I was hoarding it. Which I was. Mara was a saint and had picked me up from the hardware store and brought me back to her place. I cried the entire way there, preventing me from telling her my sad, sad tale.

“I’m sure he’s worried about his sister, and your post about him wasn’t all that flattering.”

Ugh. The stupid post. I dropped my spoon in the bowl, sat back on her comfy couch, and curled into myself. “I had to write that post because I’m a sneaky skank.”

Mara pressed her lips together, trying not to smile. “How are you a sneaky skank?” Her lips twitched up. “Try to say that ten times fast.”

If only I could laugh over this, but there was nothing funny about it. “Mara,” my voice cracked. “I . . . well . . . the truth is . . .” I knew I had to own it. “The truth is that I like Noah.”

Mara stilled, but her eyes were riddled with questions. “When you say like, do you mean like or like like?”

“Like like,” I said dramatically.

“Holy hella.”

“I know.” I cringed. “What’s wrong with me? He loves Annika, and she’s hoping they’ll rekindle their romance.”

Mara scrunched her nose. “Their high school romance?”

“I guess so. Noah is caulking her and polishing her floors.”

“Caulking her?” Mara giggled.

“You know what I mean. I shouldn’t have been spending so much time with him and harboring these feelings.”

“Did you act on those feelings?”

“No,” I whined.

“Then you did nothing wrong. But let’s go back to the fact that you have feelings for a man.” Mara sat up straight, eager for the 411.

I curled more into myself. “I didn’t mean to. What’s wrong with me?”

Mara laughed and rubbed my arm. “There’s nothing wrong with you. Noah is admittedly freakishly hot, and honestly, I’ve been wondering lately if he has feelings for you.”

I grabbed one of the afghans she’d crocheted and squeezed the life out of it. “He doesn’t. You saw him and Annika at the Halloween Bash. His costume was obviously for her.”

“Yeah, I also saw the way you looked when you danced together. I’m surprised someone didn’t post a picture of the two of you that night.”

I sat up a bit, feeling extra squirmy. “That night I was ridiculous and flirty.”

“Cams, you’re not ridiculous. I’m actually shocked it’s taken you this long to jump back on the man train.”

“I’m not jumping on any train.”

Mara scooted closer and took a dramatic breath in and out. “I know better than anyone what you lost and what my brother did to you, and as hilarious as you’ve been doing the single thing, I wonder . . .” She paused.

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