Page 62 of The Holiday Ex-Files

After I had enough kernels down my sweater and bra to plant an acre of land, I called a truce, meaning I started picking up children and setting them outside of the bin. My parents took mercy on me and grabbed the minions. Not sure where their parents had wandered off to. That left me with Jaxon, Liam, and Noah, who decided to show up out of nowhere. He had promised to jump in the bins with us, but I wasn’t holding him to it, as I obviously wasn’t his favorite person today.

I wasn’t sure why, but I felt a little nervous around him, almost as if he knew my alter ego had a crush on him.

How many times do I have to tell you that I’m not the alter ego? You are! Miss Sparkly made her point.

Or so she thought. I was still in control.

“Oh. There you are,” I said, as if I were out of breath. “Can you take the boys? I think I’ve gone from a size C cup to a D. Who needs tissues when you have corn kernels?”

Noah’s eyes zoomed in on my chest.

“Are you staring at my bre—” I went to tease him, but remembered there were little ears around.

Noah’s cheeks reddened; he obviously knew what I was going to say. “Uh, no,” he spluttered.

“If you say so.” I messed with him. He deserved it for going back on his promise.

He hastily helped his nephews out of the bin and took their hands. “I was just wondering if you wanted to do the corn maze next.”

“I want to do the hayride,” Jaxon voiced his opinion on the matter.

“That’s fine with me.” I had mixed feelings about the corn maze. I used to love it. As a teenager, I would come here at night and play hide-and-go-seek in the maze. I’d kissed my fair share of boys during those nights too. But there was one boy, man—I guess you could call Ben that—who had set my world on fire in that maze.

Half of me (the sparkly side) wanted to face my demons in there and vanquish them, but the other half feared what she would find in that maze. What if I wasn’t strong enough to defeat Ben?

Don’t think like that. Please. We can do it. Or at least I can. Just set me free, woman.

If I set her free, there would be trouble afoot. She’d want to date, and heaven forbid visit the holly jolly aisles at Hobby Lobby and probably hit every craft fair she could in November. She’d for sure OD on candy canes. She’d probably want a tree. My throat closed up thinking about it.

“Oh, okay.” Noah seemed disappointed. “I thought we could walk and talk.”

“Are you feeling guilty for ignoring me most of the day?” I evilly grinned.

He scrubbed a hand over his chiseled, stubbled face.

Those were Miss Sparkly’s observations of him. She forced me to stare. Not sure why. We both knew it was a lost cause. Whoever this woman was, he’d told her he loved her.

I’m really surprised Annika hadn’t mentioned it in our meeting this past week. She normally loves to tell us of the men who fall at her feet before she stomps all over them. Maybe Noah was different. Perhaps she loved him, too, but was having a hard time coming to terms with it because of her ex-husband. I totally got that.

If someone told me they loved me right now, even if I had feelings for them, it would be a shock to the system. How do you trust anyone after the kinds of betrayal Annika and I had endured?

“I haven’t ignored you. I’ve been catching up with your brothers.”

“You’re such a liar.” I carefully exited the corn crib. My breasts were starting to itch from all the kernels. “Anyway, I need to de-kernel myself. I’ll be right back.”

Noah chuckled. “We’ll be by the apple cider stand.”

I waved at the three of them and hustled over to the restrooms, corn kernels falling out of my sweater as I went. That had to be attractive. Thankfully, I found an empty stall where I could privately scoop kernels out of my bra. I had no idea what to do with them, so I started shoving them in my pockets. I supposed I could deposit them in the trash near the sinks.

As I picked the corn out, I thought about Noah and his offish behavior. Normally he was a happy, fun-loving guy. I realized the way he was acting did kind of hurt my feelings. It made me feel even worse for treating him so horribly the last few years. I had probably hurt his feelings too. I guess the thing that bothered me most was that, typically, Noah was a constant. I’d always known what to expect from him. Except after Ben and I had gotten engaged. He was offish then too. His reasoning was that there wasn’t room for three people in a marriage. Amen to that. Although I never looked at Noah as an intruder. Some of the best times Ben and I’d had together, Noah had been right there with us.

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