Page 38 of The Holiday Ex-Files

I hoped he was right.

“I’ll get your door.”

I smiled at him. “You don’t have to. Remember the awkward moment we just had at my condo?”

I thought back to how he’d followed me to the passenger side to open my door for me, like we were on a date. I’d teased him about how he was on autopilot and he must date a lot to make that kind of mistake. We had both reached for the door at the same time, and our hands did this weird dance. I had finally just let him open the door. It was apparently his thing, which was endearing. It was good to know there were still polite men out there.

“I like awkward moments.” He hustled out of the truck and around the front to grab my door.

I watched him, not sure what to think. But, hey, whatever floated his boat. Maybe he didn’t want to get out of practice for Annika.

He was to my door in no time and opening it like a proper gentleman, except he looked like a rogue.

A sexy rogue, Miss Sparkly purred.

I needed to see if there was some sort of medication to shut her up. She wasn’t helping the situation any. I was already nervous, and thoughts of how sexy Noah was weren’t helping any.

I think it’s you who needs some medication.

She might be onto something, but I didn’t have time to think about it or her. I was mentally trying to prepare myself for a day of who knew exactly what. All I knew was that it involved some part of my former life, and that frightened me. The bubble was about to burst a little more.

“You ready?” He wagged his brows.

“Nope.” I jumped out into the cool fall air. I swore it smelled like a cinnamon-and-spice latte. Oh wait, that was Noah. Dang him and his yummy cologne.

I took some deep cleansing breaths as I stared at the gorgeous home. The stone-and-wood beauty was worthy of the neighborhood. I noticed the large, covered porch looked bare. In the past, during this time of year, that porch would have been decked out in a Pinterest-worthy fall scene. We are talking mums and pumpkins galore, placed perfectly on bales of hay with darling scarecrows to match. I had taken their family photos four years ago in front of the happy scene. I bet Shanna was sad to miss out on one of her favorite times of year. She loved Halloween almost as much as I used to.

Hello? I still do love Halloween. And I’m just throwing this out there, but you should really offer to decorate her porch for her.

Oh. Oh. Oh. That was like giving a vampire a taste of blood. It would result in an unadulterated feeding frenzy. By feeding frenzy, I meant buying out Hobby Lobby and the local nursery. It wouldn’t be pretty. Total gateway drug.

All I’m going to say is condolence card.

Wow. Miss Sparkly was getting vicious. I thought she was the perky, cute one. I gripped the door handle of the truck, trying to ground myself before I went running into the house, begging Shanna to let me do what was probably the right thing. Three years ago, this wouldn’t have been a question. That porch would have already been decorated by yours truly.

Come on, you know you want to, Miss Sparkly taunted me. It’s the right thing to do. You’re a good person.

Well, I used to be.

“You okay?” Noah tilted his head.

I probably looked like I was having a mental episode. Which I was. “Yep,” I said, again reaching that octave well out of my range.

“You’re going to be fine, Cams,” Noah tried to reassure me. What he didn’t know was that he wasn’t the only person talking to me, and that was beyond disturbing.

“Come on.” He grabbed my free hand and wrenched me away from his truck.

Miss Sparkly took advantage of it and gripped his hand tightly. I swear I could hear her giggling and trying to figure how to make me go offline, so she could have Noah all to herself. Every time I thought of letting go of his hand, she gripped tighter. She was only in for some major disappointment, but she didn’t care. She wanted a taste of my ex-husband’s best friend. Admittedly, it did feel nice. Okay, more than nice. There was something about Noah. Something I had never taken the time to see or appreciate. He was—in a word—comfortable. Like your favorite pair of jeans. That’s what Miss Sparkly was feeling. She could be herself around him. She’d always been able to. That’s where my discomfort came in. I wasn’t comfortable in my own skin right now.

Numbly, I proceeded and let Miss Sparkly have her way for a minute or two. She felt alive and like herself. Meanwhile, I was trying to process and remind her that he was our friend and it was best for her to keep her hand to herself. But she persisted and clung to the familiarity I had been denying her for months on end. I could hardly blame her. Noah was a connection to the happiest time in our life. A time I had done everything to shun, even the good parts.

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