Page 29 of The Holiday Ex-Files

Oh. My. Gosh. Be quiet.

Now I couldn’t help but stare at his eyes and lips. They were quite nice. It was also nice that in his baby blues I saw genuine concern.

“Cams,” he said softly, “what would the woman in your graduation picture say to you about your outlook on relationships?”

I know! I know! Miss Sparkly was practically jumping up and down in my head.

I rubbed my head, she was so loud. At the same time, I was trying to ignore her.

“That bad, huh?” Noah guessed when I didn’t answer.

I let out a huge breath. “That woman didn’t know better.”

Ugh. Excuse me. Apparently, I’d offended myself. Seriously, I needed help.

“That woman would have gotten back up on the horse after being knocked off,” Noah stated.

I scowled at him. “You don’t know that.”

He’s right, Miss Sparkly sang.

“Yeah, I do.” He tapped my nose. “Deep down, you know it too.”

I like him.

That was debatable. I didn’t like how he was making my insides squirm with uncomfortable truths. All defenses went up. “Why do you care how I feel about relationships?”

“I care about you, Cami,” he sounded wounded. “I would hate to see you have any regrets,” he half snarled while moving away from me with my dog.

I felt terrible. I had gotten too used to being snarky. “Noah.” I placed my hand on his thigh. Ooh. Wow. He was a muscular specimen. I didn’t even need Miss Sparkly to tell me that. I probably should have popped my hand right off, but when he smiled and placed his hand over mine, there was something so comforting about it all. It was as if he were saying that he accepted me where I was at.

“I appreciate your concern. Really, I do. But I don’t know if I can risk another Ben.” The thought had me internally hyperventilating.

Noah enveloped my hand and squeezed it. He had no idea how much that brought my anxiety down. Maybe he was right. Holding someone’s hand does tell you that you’re safe. “I would be happy to choose the next one for you.” He sounded awfully serious.

“No thanks.” I laughed. “You obviously have your hands full picking your own dates. I think I’ll stick with Neville.” I removed my hand from Noah’s and scratched my pooch’s head. He was quite at home on Noah’s lap.

“I don’t know. His breath stinks and he doesn’t know how to pee like a man,” Noah teased.

“Hey, don’t diss on my man. At least he’s loyal,” I whispered.

“Cams,” his tone took a more solemn tone. “There are good, loyal men out there.”

I rolled my eyes. Sure, my dad and brothers were good men. But outside the Jenkins gene pool, I wasn’t too sure. Even Noah, as good as he seemed, was dating half the women in the state. I didn’t mention it because he would just say it was for a noble purpose. Not sure how he figured that.

“Are you happy?” He threw out that question without any warning or pretense.

I sat back, feeling like he had sucker punched me. I needed to catch my breath before I could answer. “I’m not unhappy,” I responded honestly.

“That’s not the same thing as being happy.” He looked around my condo. “Where are all your Halloween decorations? You have to be missing your pumpkin-shaped pillows.”

I totally am. I can’t believe you threw those away. Miss Sparkly was about to cry.

“Have you even watched Hocus Pocus or Practical Magic? Had a Harry Potter marathon? What about It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown?” He taunted me, knowing exactly how much that one would get to me. It was a beloved classic of my family’s.

I glared at him for daring to go so low.

My withering glance did nothing to faze him. In fact, he grinned when he leaned over and went in for the kill. “How could you miss The Nightmare Before Christmas?”

I hurried to place my finger on his warm lips before he could say it, but I was too late. He had me shaking where I sat. “We do not say the C-word in this house. Ever.” Especially in regard to the movie I loved as a child. A totally genius movie that combined my two favorite holidays.

He looked pleased with himself and didn’t even try to remove my finger. Instead, he held my gaze.

I felt like he was trying to tell me something with the mesmerizing ocean of blue that swirled in his eyes, but I didn’t understand. What I did know was that I liked the feel of his lips; they were the perfect amount of supple. That was enough to pop my finger right off them. I chalked it up to my dry spell of manly affection. Seriously, this was Noah. My ex’s Noah. The man who dated every other woman on the planet, Noah. I felt like I had to keep reminding myself of that.

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