Page 24 of A Throne for the Taking

Least of all Alexei himself.

Alexei, who had made it so plain that he desired her—in a       physical sense at least. Who had acknowledged that he wanted her at his side, as       his queen, his consort, but only in a dynastic marriage. She would be deceiving       herself if she even allowed the hope of anything more to creep into her mind.       Nothing had changed since the night she had gone to Alexei’s room.

Well, yes, one thing had changed. And that was that she no       longer lay awake, alone in her bed, in an agony of sexual hunger and       frustration. She shared Alexei’s room, Alexei’s bed, every night and the       passionate fire that had burned through them both that first time showed no       signs of dimming. If anything, it had grown wilder, fiercer, stronger, with       every night that passed. Though after that one heated coming together Alexei had       always been meticulous, even dogmatic, about using the contraception they had       both forgotten in the heat of the moment the first time.

But there was more to life than their searing sexual       connection. There were the days to get through as well. The rest of the time it       was business as usual, the demands of the throne taking so much time, so much       energy. She woke every morning to find that the space beside her where Alexei       had lain was cold and empty, revealing how he had been up so much earlier and       how long he had been gone. Spending time with those ‘new mistresses’, the       affairs of state that absorbed him so completely.

He had nothing else to offer her. No emotion, no caring,       no...

Choking up inside on the last word, Ria swung away from the       mirror, unable to meet her own eyes.

I can’t love you. I loved once—adored           her... Lost her.

No love. That was the word she was avoiding. The word she was       running away from. The one that had no place in Alexei’s life but that had taken       over her existence completely.

The acid of unshed tears burned at the back of her eyes as she       remembered that morning, when Alexei had been up early and dressing as usual       while she still dozed. She had tried to lie still, not speaking a word, but in       the end it had proved impossible. He had been heading towards the door when she       had been unable to hold back any longer.

‘When will you be back?’

She knew the words were a mistake as soon as she let them pass       her lips, digging her teeth down painfully into her tongue as if she could hold       them back. But too late. The stiffness of that long, straight spine, the set of       his shoulders under the impeccably tailored steel-grey silk suit, told its own       story without words.

‘I have a full day.’ It was flat, unemotional. ‘But we will be       together this evening. For the ball.’

Tonight the Black and White Ball would mark the culmination of       all the ceremonial that led up to Alexei’s accession to the throne. After       tonight there would be the coronation itself.

And then their wedding.

On their wedding day he had said he would release her father.       That move would mean that the balance of her mother’s mind would be restored,       possibly even her life would be saved when she had her husband back at her side.       But wouldn’t the dark hand of the past still reach out and touch the present,       overshadowing it?

‘Alexei. Are you sure you should release my father?’

He had started to move away again but that brought him up       short, stilling totally.

‘I thought that was what you wanted.’

‘For my mother, yes. I’d give anything to see her happy and       healthy again. And no matter what he is, she loves my father. But won’t Gregor       still be a threat? To Mecjoria. To you.’

To us, she wanted to add but it was       a step too far.

‘Why do you think I haven’t let your father out already?’

When had he turned, swinging round to face her? She didn’t       think she had actually seen him move, but suddenly she was looking into his       face, drawn into sculpted lines, hard and carved as a marble statue.

‘Do you really think I would want him to have any more chances       to bully you?’

Bully her? It was the last thing       she had been expecting. She had thought that Alexei had left her father in       prison out of revenge. That he had wanted to show he had control over the other       man as Gregor had once had control over his future. She had never dreamed that       he might actually be doing this to protect her.

‘I’d like to see him try. I came to you because you are the       king Mecjoria needs and everything I’ve seen just proves I was right in that. If       he saw you now—saw how you’ve handled things—even my father would have to think       again.’

‘He’d have hated the walkabout.’

He was thinking of the events of the day before, when she and       Alexei had opened a brand-new children’s hospital here in the capital. The       official part of the ceremony had been over in less than an hour, but the crush       of people waiting to see them had shouted and called their names until Alexei       had totally discarded the protocol and planning that had set the timetable for       the day and launched into a spontaneous walkabout, shaking hands, talking,       smiling. She doubted if she had ever seen him smile so much. He’d even...

A sudden memory of the day came back to haunt her.

A little boy had been pushed to the front of the crowd, a       slightly bent and dented bunch of flowers in his hand. He’d tugged on Alexei’s       trousers, drawing the response he’d needed. And Alexei had turned, crouching       down beside him, his attention totally focussed on the one small person. Totally       at ease, he had lifted the child up, balancing him against his hip as he’d       turned to face Ria.

‘You have an admirer,’ he’d said. ‘And he wants to give his       flowers to the princess.’

‘Not protocol...’ Her voice broke the last word into two       disjointed syllables as she struggled with the memory. ‘Not at all what I was       trained for.’ Her smile said how little she cared. ‘But it was the right thing       for the day.’

‘And the future.’

Alexei wished he could express just what that reception had       meant to him. Those smiling faces, the cheers, the flowers, the hands thrust       forward to take his, the women wanting to press kisses on his cheek. His mouth       had ached with smiling, his fingers raw from clasping so many other hands. So       many times he had been told he was the image of his father; so many people had       said ‘welcome back’. If he turned or glanced out of the corner of his eyes, Ria       had been at his side as she had been so many times and with her support he had       actually felt free...

‘It felt like coming home.’

‘You are home. This is where you belong.’

But where did she belong? The question hit him like a blow in       the face. She had been at his side but had that been from choice? What would she       do if she was left free to follow her own destiny, without being trapped into       linking it with his? The thought of how he had ensnared her, how he had       manipulated her into his life, into his bed, was like the sting of a whip on his       soul.

No—he hadn’t manipulated her into his bed. She had come to him.       When they had reached the palace he had tried to keep his distance from her,       wanting to give her time to consider her position, but she had broken through       the walls he had built around himself and just appeared at his door. Walking       into his room as if she belonged there.

---