Page 49 of The Other Side of Tomorrow

They’ll never see him get to grow old and get married, have kids, and do normal things.

But because of his death, my parents get to watch me do those things.

I look at Harlow, my breathing funny as I fight back tears.

“I shouldn’t have shown you,” she mutters, trying to take the paper back but I place my hand over it.

“No, I’m glad you did.”

“Willa …,” she starts, and I shake my head.

I stand and grab a pair of scissors, cutting out the article and picture.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“I don’t know,” I answer honestly.

I climb the stairs to my room and clip the newspaper to my lights where my instant photos hang.

I stand there, unable to move.

I stare at the boy who had so much life left to live but doesn’t get to now, and I promise myself that I’ll live my life to the best of my abilities because he can’t.

I might not have gotten his heart, but suddenly mine seems to be beating for the both of us.

Willa: Hey, I wanted to say I heard about T.J. and I’m sorry.

I bite my lip and read my text ten times over, analyzing it like crazy every single time. I hope it doesn’t sound too insensitive but isn’t too much at the same time. I also, don’t mention that I’ve gotten a kidney. Not yet, at least. I know Harlow and Meredith wouldn’t tell anybody, because they don’t feel it’s their business to tell, and it’s not. But since chances seem likely I got T.J.’s kidney I don’t think now is the time to break that potential news to Spencer. Not that I think it’d bother him, but it couldn’t possibly be easy to hear days after your friend died.

Minutes tick by and I break out in a sweat.

I flop down on my bed, cover my face with a pillow, and scream.

I shouldn’t have said anything.

I sound like an idiot.

He’s going to think I’m crazy. It’s not like I’m friends with him, why should I be texting him about his dead best friend?

My phone vibrates, and I dive for it on the end of my bed.

Spencer: Thanks. It’s … weird. I literally saw him that day and now I’ll never see him again.

Willa: I want you to know I’m here to talk.

Spencer: That means a lot … I’m not sure I can. Not yet.

Willa: I understand.

Spencer: Would you want to come with me to his funeral tomorrow?

I hold my breath.nbsp;

Go to the funeral of my maybe donor? Uh … I might throw up if I do that. I can’t imagine having to see his family mourn for him while I sit there knowing I might have his organ inside me.

Willa: I’m sorry, but I…

Willa: I don’t think I can.

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