Page 76 of Reclaiming My Wife

Wiping her tears, she sniffed. “I know that I’m a people pleaser. My parents used to tell me that when I was a teenager, but it’s just who I am. I take everything personally.”

“Therapy isn’t about changing who you are, Cindy. I would never do that. It’s about taking what’s happening to you and dealing with it in a healthy way. When you and Steven broke up, I wanted you to learn what you deserved. When the tabloids gossip about you, I want you to remember it’s because you have power. When you lose an award, I want it to motivate you to do better. And when someone like Brendan is a jackass to you—”

“You want me to grow stronger.”

“As your therapist, yes. But as your friend, I wanted you to slap him.” Happy that she was feeling better, I smiled. “Brendan and I made mistakes when we were married, and it drove us apart. We’re still dealing with those mistakes, and rather than dealing with each other, we’re taking it out on other people.”

“As a therapist, you would know that it’s not healthy,” Cindy said primly.

“That’s very true.” I sighed. “But as a person, I know how hard that is, and it’s why I think I’m going to make a good therapist. A patient one.”

“You’re not going to make a good therapist. You are one. You already have your M.S. Clinical, Practitioner degree, right?”

I nodded. “Yes. That’s true.”

She smiled. “So, see? You might not have finished your doctorate, but you already have a ton of education and experience under your belt. You need to take that interview, Jillian. It’s really going to launch your career.” Leaning over, she gave me a big hug. “And I think it’s time for me to go.”

“Go? I thought you were going to stay a few days.”

“I was, but I don’t need to be here as much as you and your husband need some alone time. I think you need to focus on your problems rather than dealing with mine.”

Part of me didn’t want her to leave. She was an easy shield to hide behind, but I also knew that was wrong. “You can handle anything,” I said as I stood. “You just need to believe in yourself.”

She beamed at me, and I left her to finish packing. It took her almost two hours before she actually pulled out. She had to say goodbye to everyone at the ranch, and even gave Brendan, who was still in his office, a curt goodbye and a thanks for his hospitality.

He apologized for his behavior, but his gaze never left mine.

Finally, we were alone. “She’s not the only one that you owe an apology to.”

“For what? Forbidding you to go on some ridiculous talk show or for leaving you?” he snapped. “Which, I might add, is a bunch of bullshit. You checked out of our relationship long before I brought up divorce.”

My temper spiked. So much for an adult conversation. “I was right there with you, Brendan.”

“The hell you were.” His eyes blazed with anger as he stood. “You needed space, and I gave it to you, but when I tried to touch you again, you flinched. When I tried to get you back out into the world, you dug a deeper hole for yourself.”

Stiffening, I shook my head. “I’m not going to let you do this. I’m not going to let you blame me all over again,” I whispered as I turned and hurried from the office.

He followed me. “You wanted to talk, so we’re going to talk. You left me, Jillian.”

“I really didn’t.” Ranch hands stopped and stared as I hurried by. I would have broken into a full run, but I didn’t want to give Brendan the satisfaction. I wasn’t going to put up with this. I was going to pack and leave. The deal be damned.

When I finally reached the house, I wrenched the door open. I wanted the satisfaction of slamming it in his face, but he was too close and caught it. Pissed, I turned and marched to my room. Pulling out my luggage, I unzipped it and opened it only to have him slam it closed and toss it on the floor.

“What do you want from me?” I hissed. “I was grieving, damn it!”

“And I never got the chance to!”

With his admission, my mouth dropped open. “What?”

Briefly closing his eyes, he ran his hands through his hair and shook his head. “We lost a child, Jillian, but I was so worried about losing my wife that I never got the chance to grieve for the baby. And then I lost you anyway. I let you pull away too far out of my reach, and then I couldn’t get you back. When I said the words divorce, I thought it might snap you back. Make you feel something again, but you just pulled away even further.” He visibly deflated. “You even looked relieved.”