Page 83 of Reason to Believe (White Lace 2)

But not at the expense of my pride and work ethic.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

“There’s no right way to say this, so I’m just going to do it.” Our eyes locked, regret staring back at me. “I’m selling the company.”

I barked out a laugh. “You’re selling White Lace?” I turned away from him, back to my computer. That was crazy talk.

“Yes. I am.”

I froze, my eyes the only part of me that looked at him. His face was stone cold. And I felt my casual smile drain from my face. And the more I thought about it, the more my smile faded into a confused frown.

“No way. You can’t.” Finally, I moved, sitting back in my chair. It felt like all the blood was leaving my body. “You’d never.”

He cocked his head and regarded me with that same affection he’d given me since I was eleven. It had been a look I’d missed over the last few months, because he’d been so absent. “You’re unhappy.”

“Who said…?” The fact that my voice was a little higher on the octave scale only proved how right he was. I shook my head, but didn’t get the chance to continue.

“Benson, I’ve known you more than half your life. I know when you’re unhappy.”

“I’m just busy, Hirsh. There’s a lot to do.”

I’d convinced myself that I was act

ually doing a good job. That people outside of this company thought I had promise. But now I find out I was sucking so bad that Hirsh was selling the company. If Max had still been VP, I bet the thought wouldn’t have even crossed Hirsh’s mind.

“Fine.” I jumped out of my chair and started to pace. “Let’s say I am unhappy. Why would that even matter?”

“I learned something when Max decided to go out on his own and buy a hotel.” He turned in his seat and followed me as I paced beside my desk. “It was a hard pill to swallow, but it made me realize that I had let him down. I let both of you down.”

“Hirsh…” I stopped short and ran my hand through my hair. “If there’s one thing in this world I know, it’s that you did not let me down.”

He shook his head. “Porn is all I’ve ever known.” I could tell by the look on his face that he was sincerely upset over this. “And it was good for me. I assumed it would be good for you, too.”

He started to continue, but I stopped him by holding up my hand. “I owe you everything. You saved me from a neglectful mother and potentially a sad and unsafe life. Whatever I need to do to keep this company going for you, I will.”

I just wasn’t working hard enough. I could do better.

“I know…and that’s why I’m selling. The deal has been finalized. On February first, White Lace officially belongs to Randall Hunter.”

“But…”

Randall Hunter? Besides being a complete asshat, he owned the largest porn production company in California. And this was all going down in February? That was only two months away. Choosing to find a life outside of White Lace was all fine and dandy when it was a concept. But now it was real, and happening much faster than I had anticipated.

“You can’t sell, Hirsh. What about the actors? Our staff? Our existing contracts? You can’t sell to Hunter. He’ll pick the company apart. You’ve worked too hard to…”

I was kind of losing my shit. The reality of having to face my future without White Lace was terrifying. But it was a good thing I’d always feared this day would come, and had stashed away money to fund my way to Silicon Valley. I was a porn director, and I had to go where there was work. But now that it was happening, it didn’t seem like the right plan.

“We’ve all worked hard to get where we are today and I know that you’ve had a big hand in our sales taking off over the last five years. Both you and Max. You were a good team.”

“More like he was a rock star and I rode his coattails.”

Everyone knew that. It wasn’t until he left that I had to fend for myself.

“Ben.” He looked at me disapprovingly.

“I know I’m good behind the camera.” I sat down again, rolling my chair under the desk as far as I could go. “I’m really good behind the camera, but I couldn’t even finish school. Why am I so damn arrogant?”

“You have every right to be. You are a genius, and I can only imagine what you could create on film without people fucking.”

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