Page 31 of Light Up My Life (Forbidden Heat 3)

“No,” I replied. “I take it you’ve been here a time or two? It seems that a lot of the staff are already familiar with you.”

He shrugged. “I’ve been here a few times. They have amazing steaks actually. One of the few higher classed joints that actually serve real, solid food.”

The waiter appeared just then with the bottle of wine Lance had ordered. He opened the bottle and poured us both a good glass of red wine. Then he carefully wiped the mouth of the bottle with a cloth napkin and then sat the bottle down before leaving.

I took a sip of the wine. It was delicious. Full bodied, a hint of sweet, and a robust flavor that made me feel warm and fuzzy from the very first taste. I smiled with delight as the liquid settled in my stomach and I felt the alcohol hitting my bloodstream.

“Wow, that’s sweet,” I said. “Great choice.”

“I enjoy a good wine,” Lance said. “My father actually has an extensive wine collection. He’s been collecting to it and adding to it for years. It’s one of his prized collections actually. Kind of sad, but he is a wine guy. He is also a big whiskey aficionado. I think he just does that because that is something rich people are supposed to do.”

“I’ve never understood why rich people feel they have to act a certain way,” I said. “If I ever came into a bunch of money, I would stay the same. I wouldn’t let it change me.”

“A lot of people say that,” Lance replied. “But money has a way of affecting change. The thing is, most of the time it changes everyone else around you. Everybody else treats you differently while you stay the same. It’s bizarre from what I hear. Of course, I grew up with my family already privileged, so I’m only speaking from what I’ve observed.”

“What was it like growing up rich? Knowing you could basically have whatever you wanted whenever you wanted?”

He shrugged. I could tell that the question kind of bothered him. It was probably a question he’d been asked many times over in his life.

“I don’t know how to answer that since it’s all I knew growing up. It took me a while to realize that not everyone lived that way. And it was tough at school. My father insisted that I go to public school so that I would see how the real world worked. This led to me having to learn to fight off bullies at a young age. As soon as the other kids realized who my father was and that we had money, it automatically made me a big target. That’s one of the reasons I took up martial arts initially.”

“I also dealt with some bullying and it led me to martial arts,” I replied. “Which is a good thing because I honestly don’t know where I’d be without it. I’ve been away from it for a while and now I’ve come back to it. I can’t believe I ever actually stopped doing it.”

“Why did you stop?”

I was quiet for a moment. “I stopped when my parents died. After that, I just didn’t feel like doing it. Hell, I didn’t feel like doing anything. I kind of slipped into a dark depression that I’m just now starting to come out of.”

“Wow, I’m sorry to hear that,” Lance said. “I can only imagine how tough that was.”

“I was eighteen, a freshman at college. They died in a car accident. And I just crumbled. Suddenly, I couldn’t afford my next semester at school, and I had to get a job and pay my bills. Most of the life insurance money they had, went for funeral costs and to pay the other driver’s medical bills. Apparently, my father was at fault in the accident somehow. He ran a red light and broadsided someone. I believe he might have fallen asleep at the wheel. My father was a diabetic and his blood sugar often dropped, and he passed out if it became unstable.”

Lance reached over and touched my hand gently. His touch felt good, reassuring. I loved the way he could comfort me so well with just the slightest of gestures. He radiated warmth. I knew right then that I was falling hard for this man. I could fight it as much as I wanted, try to tell myself I wasn’t going to let it happen because it didn’t feel like the right time, that it would somehow get in the way of my plans and my newfound ambition for my life, but at the end of the day those were just deflections to protect my heart. I was scared. I was afraid to love anyone or let them get close to me. I wasn’t sure I could handle losing them if something tragic were to happen.

I wiped tears from my eyes.

“It’s ok,” Lance said. “You are strong. You are a survivor. I know your parents would both be so proud of you.”

“Thanks,” I replied.

The food came shortly after and we both dug in. It was delicious. I’d ordered a salmon and it was the most amazing thing I’d ever eaten. Every single bite tasted like a little bit of Heaven. And it seemed to pair perfectly with the wine I was drinking. I’ve always wondered about wine pairings and which goes with what, but it wasn’t something I’d ever really thought about.

“So, what is the plan now?” Lance asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, what is next on the path of your life? I’m one of those people who always has to be working towards some kind of a goal. It’s a bit of a sickness really. I feel that if I’m not working towards something then I’m somehow just stagnating, going backwards. It’s not in my nature to not keep moving.”

“I used to be that way and lately I feel like I’ve had a bit of an awakening to get back to that point. It’s a good feeling knowing that you are working towards something. Right now, I’m working on getting back in shape for kickboxing, teaching the class, and I might be getting back into competitive fast pitch softball again.”

His eyes went wide with surprise. “Really? Well, that sounds awesome.”

“Yeah, a pro team out of Cleveland are having tryouts, so I’m going to give it a shot. I probably won’t make it, but it is worth the try.”

“Right on,” he said. “I’ll bet you will be great.”

He reached over and took my hand again. He held it warmly in his and kissed it softly. His mouth sent shivers of excitement up and down my arm. I felt fortunate to be there with him tonight and I could tell that the way things were going, I might lower the wall I’d built around myself and we would make love before the evening was through. I wanted him. It was that pure and simple. I knew that I was doing something out of character for me, I was stepping past some boundaries that I had set for myself and it caused me anxiety, but I didn’t care anymore. I was done with all that. I just wanted to step out and let things go freely for once.

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