Page 61 of Beneath the Stands (Sugarlake 2)

“Bee, who’s at the door?”

I peer around her, hearing Jeremy’s voice. He comes to the door, standing next to Sabrina. “Coach.” He tips his chin. “Nice to see you, you looking for Becca?”

I nod, suddenly unable to say the words.

Where is she?

He rubs Sabrina’s shoulder, whispering in her ear. She gives a curt nod, and he walks out, closing the door. Jerking his head to follow, he walks around the corner of the building, leaning against the brick wall, one leg perched behind him.

My chest pulls tight and my fists clench at the show he’s putting on. Like I have time to leisurely take a stroll. Like every second we spend walking isn’t a second further away from wherever she is.

“She’s gone.” His voice is as flat as his face.

The words form an arrow straight through my heart, damaging the already cracked pieces.

“What do you mean ‘she’s gone?’” I hiss, jealousy licking at my veins.

Of course, he already knows.

“She left me a voicemail this morning.” He rubs a hand over his mouth, blowing out a breath. “She asked me not to tell you anything, but she’s stock full of shit ideas, so screw what she wants right now.”

He pulls out his phone, pressing a few buttons. Becca’s voice floats to my ears, my soul tearing through the wounds in my chest to reach her.

“Hi, Jer.” Her voice is choked—soft, like she’s holding back a sob.

My nostrils flare at the sound, my breath whooshing out from the urge to soothe her sadness.

“I’m leavin’, Jer. I…” She sniffles. “I can’t stay here. Goin’ back with my folks. I know it won’t make much sense to you, and honestly, it don’t make much sense to me either, but it’s just what needs to happen. I need to.. To ge-g-...” Her voice breaks.

My hand comes up to rub my chest, trying to ease the pressure that’s building with every word.

“I need to get away fr–from everything here. I hope you understand. I’ll miss you so much, Jer. I love you, you know?”

My stomach heaves at her words, my head growing dizzy.

What about me?

“You were right. Everything you said.” She sighs. “You know, about that guy you love? Don’t… don’t settle for a man who won’t tell the world you’re his, Jer. Everyone deserves to b-be loved by someone who ain’t afraid of what it means.” She sucks in a stuttered breath.

My stomach flips and my eyes snap to Jeremy’s. The implication of her words are heavy in his stance. His face is wet, glistening from tear tracks that line his face, but he holds my gaze, his jaw tense and posture straight.

Jeremy’s gay.

I should feel relief, but with her gone, I find I don’t care.

“I love you, Jer. I’ll try to keep in touch. And don’t… don’t tell Eli, okay? I don’t want him to know.”

A piece of my crumpled heart breaks, the jagged edge splitting my insides as it falls.

Jeremy doesn’t speak, just slips his phone back into his pocket.

“She’s gone.” The words surprise me as I say them. Who knew a corpse could speak?

Jeremy nods, wiping his cheeks. “You gonna go after her?”

I huff out a laugh, shaking my head as I stare at the ground. I consider his words. I could track her ass down. Fuck an apology out of her, and force her to admit she feels this. Feels us.

But the thought of going back to Sugarlake chokes my throat until I’m gasping for air.

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