Page 54 of Beneath the Stars (Sugarlake 1)

Sam?

“What?” I whoosh out. “Are… are you back home?”

His mouth lifts slightly. “Don’t sound so excited.”

“I’m not anything when it comes to you.” I shrug.

I really want to tell him that yes, I do want someone else on the project. But, the last thing I need is for Regina to think I threw a tantrum, especially when I’m on thin ice. “You’re already here so you might as well stay, but let’s get one thing straight. We are not friends. We are not acquaintances. We are nothin’. In fact, we’re less than nothin’. Let’s just agree to make this process as quick and painless as possible.”

He lowers his head and nods. The muscle in his jaw tics, and his fingers tighten around the edge of the desk. “Whatever you want, Go–Alina.”

I let out the breath I was holding. “Good, now show me what you’ve got.”

Somehow, I’ve made it through the day. I’m sitting at my kitchen table staring at the bottle of wine I’ve been saving for a special occasion. For this special occasion. The celebration of my new job. The start to the rest of my life. Only, I don’t feel much like celebrating now.

I never in a thousand years expected Chase to come barreling into my life again, and I’m left off-kilter and nauseous from the way he’s spun me around. Even after all this time, the effect he has on me is heady.

I tap my fingernails on the table, eyes bouncing from the empty wine glass, to the bottle, to my phone. Jax and Becca are both expecting my call. I grab the bottle ready to pour an ample glass, but before I get the chance my phone screen lights up.

The Watering Hole.

Of course. The perfect ending to a perfect day. I set the bottle back down, eyeing it longingly as I accept the call.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Lee.”

I sigh, “Hi, Johnny. Daddy need a ride?”

“Yeah. He uhh… isn’t takin’ too kindly to being cut off. It’s not a good night.”

I bang my forehead on the table, praying that I’ll wake up and this day will have been a nightmare. “Okay, I’m on my way.”

Daddy’s sitting in his usual spot at the bar when I arrive. He’s hunched around a glass of water, glaring at Johnny who’s at the other end, pouring drinks.

“Daddy.”

His head lolls over and he gazes at me through hazy eyes. “Gail?”

Bad night, indeed.

“No Daddy, it’s me. Alina.” I reach out to put my hand on his back, but he shrugs me off.

He snarls. “They’re always callin’ you out here, like a… a goddamned babysitter. Go home, I’m just fine.” His words are slurred, but years of practice have tuned my ears to understand the garble.

“You’re not fine, and you’re lucky Johnny hasn’t banned you from this place. Let’s just get you home where you can get a good night’s rest.” I reach out again, looping my arm through his to support his weight as I pull him from the stool.

He complains but doesn’t resist. I mouth “thank you” at Johnny while I walk Daddy out. It isn’t until we’re in my car that I feel like I can breathe again.

After I get him settled at the house, I head straight to the cemetery to visit Mama. When Daddy’s at his worst, being next to her, if only in spirit, is the only balm that soothes my soul.

“Hey, Mama.”

My back’s against her headstone, and I finger the wilting flowers next to me. “Sorry I didn’t bring any tulips, this wasn’t exactly a planned visit. I just needed someone to talk to, I guess.”

I lean my head back, staring at the stars. “You know what’s funny, Mama? There hasn’t been a single night in the past eight years where I’ve been able to see stars and not think of Chase. Not once. In eight freakin’ years. But then last night, I sat on my patio and counted as many stars as I could find without him ever crossin’ my mind.” I huff out a laugh. “Joke’s on me, huh?”

I don’t say anything else, just close my eyes and try to find some peace. Hoping she can calm the storm that’s swirling inside me. I kiss my palm and press it against the engraving of her name. “I love you, Mama. I won’t ask if you’ve got any pull up there… not tonight. I’ll save that for our usual visit. Give you some time to come up with a different answer.” I smile softly, even though I feel the pain of loss sneaking through the cracks of my heart.

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