Page 131 of Tell Me When It's Over

“Kyler, you have nothing to apologize for.” Cupping my hand over his, I lean into his palm and give him a reassuring smile. “I know why you did it. I’m not mad. A little hurt? Sure. But I’ll get over it because we’re here now.”

“We could have been here sooner.”

Does he mean here in this specific position or here in this time and setting? I’m not sure, and I bank it for later because that isn’t the pressing matter at him. “Do you think Harry loved my mom? The real kind of love?”

Truthfully, I don’t think there’s a fake kind. I believe there are layers to love, some felt far deeper than others, but none that are phony. Plus, Harry is the blunt, no-bullshit kind of person who wouldn’t fake anything because he doesn’t need to, least of all love. But I had to know what Kyler thought anyway because it mattered to me.

Because I think it mattered to Mom.

“Yeah,” he answers quietly, pressing his lips to the crown of my head before adding, “I think he did.”

I don’t know why the expelled breath leaves me in relief, but it does. All the tension locking up my body leaves with it, and I rest my head against his chest again, my nose taking in his usual scent, before closing my eyes and listening to his breathing.

“Hiring that PI was the best and worst thing I did,” he tells me softly. “It was the worst because we had to lose time, but the best because I think time is what we needed.” I’m inclined to disagree with him, but he won’t let me. “I knew too, Leighton. I wouldn’t have hired anyone if I didn’t suspect. Even though I liked you early on, was glad to call you family, I still felt I needed to know what game Katherine was playing. To…I don’t know, do something about it. But when I got that information, the confirmation I already knew in my gut, I realized I didn’t want to use it if it meant the inevitable.

“There are a lot of things I’ve questioned about in life but wanting you in mine has never been one. I could handle your mom’s lies, deal with the way she treated the lifestyle we lived, if it meant keeping you. Because I did, Lenny. I wanted to keep you around. And I’m…” His words get thick, hesitant, and I feel his arm wrap around me again in a protective embrace. “I’m not sure when things changed after you came back, but they did. I want to hate myself for it, but I can’t. Even more, I want you to hate me for it but—” When I realize what he’s saying, my heart kicks up a notch or three in my chest. “—I don’t think you do. In fact, I think you feel the opposite. Like me.”

I’m not sure how I manage, but I croak out, “The opposite?” before breathing hard against his chest as one of his palms glides up my back, my neck, and cups the back of my head until his fingers tangle in my hair. I’m suddenly warm, too warm, and his lingering touch does nothing to help me.

“I think the Bishops are drawn to the Grier women,” he murmurs, words echoing his father’s, his fingers twitching in the strands of my hair. “Something about you makes us go crazy. We can act like real assholes sometimes. But you know what? I’m not going to make the mistake Harry did.”

My heart is in my throat now, drumming loudly, but not deafening his words when his lips travel down to my temple and press a soft kiss against it. “I’m not planning on letting you walk away easily this time unless it’s your decision.”

I choke out a laugh, thinking he’s crazy that I’d walk away from him now. It’s easy to say I won’t be walking away from him again unless he gets sick of me, and I hope that doesn’t happen any time soon.

“Want to know why, Leighton?”

I think I already know. But I want him to say it, to tell me the words that my heart is aching to hear. Words that I’m not sure Mom ever got in her last days from anyone other than me. So, I nod into his chest and wind my arms around his neck and wait.

Wait for what feels like an eternity before his breathy words brush against my skin. “It’s because I love the way you’ve always been dedicated to your mother, loving so openly and fully even when it wasn’t deserved.” I swallow down the emotion trying to suffocate me as a finger strokes the back of my neck. “And I love the way you know what you want to do with your life and how you want to succeed without anybody else’s help, even though everybody is willing to give you it if you’d only ask.” I find myself smiling into his shirt, clutching his shoulder blades. “Sometimes I look at you and wonder how I got so fucking lucky to know a girl with a heart so willing to be shared with me in any way possible, no matter what’s been done to it already. It makes me want to cherish it for life and make sure nobody hurts it again. I love you, Leighton Grier. All the pieces of you. Even the ones that love Violet Wonders.”

My laugh is watery as I grasp the fabric of his shirt and try evening out my breath before I dare open my mouth to match what he told me. It’s not the first time we’ve exchanged those words, but it’s the first time they’ve caressed my skin like smooth silk, causing a fire to start in the pit of my stomach and spread quickly. Putting to words what I feel for him is nearly impossible because I’ve loved him for years, in every way possible, with every label attached.

But I try. I try to articulate that feeling building, building because he deserves that and so much more. “I fell in love with the way you were always on my side even if I messed up,” I whisper, unsure if I can speak any louder than the quietest notch. “I could probably list all the ways I fell in love with you, and it would make me a bad person because all of those ways unfolded when I was with…when I dated Chase. So, I’ll say this and only this.”

Licking my dry lips, I inhale and tip my head up enough to graze the tip of my nose along his throat until he shivers in my hold. “I fell in love with the way you touched me without even using your hands. It was the looks. The way you were so quick to forgive. How willing you were to fight even if I told you not to, and to apologize when you had no reason to say you’re sorry. And the song. Watching you do what you love made me love you a whole lot more than I should have, but I couldn’t help it. It’s always been Kyler and Leighton, hasn’t it?”

With no hesitation at all, he answers me with in a low tone that’s husky and filled with a truth that we’ve never gotten to speak until now. “Yeah, Lenny. It’s always been us.”

And maybe we should be worried about the repercussions of that admission because the truth tends to have more consequences than any lie spoken.

Ours is a big one.

/> The lie that led us here…

His honesty is more than I could have asked for, and tingles of satisfaction prick every part of me as I smile to myself. But when I think about what I’ve done that bears admission, the smile wipes away and I feel the need to tell him what I’ve been too afraid of.

Blurting it out isn’t what I had in mind, but my guilty conscious doesn’t give me many other options when I open my mouth. “I sold your poster online for a lot of money,” I tell him in a rush, cringing at how it all comes out in one long string of barely cohesive words.

When I dare pull back and glance up at him, he’s already looking at me. Confusion mars his otherwise flawless face, his brows pinched. “What poster?”

The fact he doesn’t remember only makes me feel a tiny bit better. It isn’t like I pawned anything he specifically gave me. Technically, Mia gifted me the solo art that hung on my bedroom wall for years. He penned his signature in silver Sharpie that I would smile at sometimes when I looked at it. “The one that you signed for me. I know I shouldn’t have, and I really didn’t want to, but I…”

“You did what you had to do.” He says it with a shrug, unbothered unlike I have been over it. I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell him for a while now, and never found the right words.

“You’re not…mad?”

One of his brows lifts. “Do you want me to be upset with you? I know things were tough, so I understand why you did it. Honestly, I forgot all about the damn thing. It was just a poster.”

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