Page 122 of Tell Me When It's Over

Part of me doesn’t want to talk about that considering Chase won’t even answer my texts. I’ve tried apologizing, but he won’t give me the time of day. And ever since I’ve took a step forward with Kyler, I’ve felt even worse about what I’d done to him. “We’re not seeing each other anymore.”

“That’s a shame.”

I bite my tongue.

She sighs. “Can I ask you something?”

Nerves prickle my skin as I nod.

“We were friends, right?”

My answer is instant. “We were. Why?”

Her painted pink lips press together a moment, her eyes darting past me. “Because you didn’t trust me. You never told me who you were living with, and even when I found out, you never invited me over. It was like you didn’t want me in that part of your life.”

Hurt—hurt for her—laces through my veins. I always knew she’d been upset over it, but it was one of the many things we never got a chance to talk about. “It wasn’t that I didn’t trust you, Nora. I had enough trouble being part of that life on my own. The way they lived wasn’t the same way I did, and my mom…” My throat tightens as I swallow down emotion. “There was a lot I didn’t want anyone to know about. It wasn’t just you.”

She doesn’t look like she believes me based on her pinched expression—lips flat, brows furrowed slightly. “You let Beckham over. Friends let other friends into their lives no matter what. That’s what we’re supposed to be there for.”

I swallow, staying quiet. After what Beckham did, things happened so fast. I barely had time to absorb anything before I was being kicked out.

“You know, I felt a little bad for being valedictorian at first. I know, even if you didn’t tell me about your homelife, that it wasn’t pretty, and it seemed like Stanford was the one thing you were always excited about. But then I thought, why? Why should I feel bad when I worked my ass off at everything I was a part of. I got a full ride because I studied and dedicated my time to every single class, with or without you. It sucks what happened to you, Leighton. But maybe if you’d given me the chance, I would have tried being there for you. We could have…” She shakes her head, shrugging. “I don’t know. Maybe we could have been friends for a lot longer. We could have tried going to Stanford together. Roomed together like we wanted.”

A sour feeling cements itself in the pit of my stomach. How many times had we talked about being roommates at college? At getting dressed up and going to parties? Studying together? That seems like a lifetime ago, an entirely different world.

And somehow…somehow that world doesn’t feel like mine anymore. Because Mom took that world from me. I grew out of that phase, those dreams, and now they feel like figments of my imagination.

“We could have been…” Her words fade, hurt still thick in each syllable, as she sighs heavily. “It doesn’t matter anymore, I guess.”

I fight frowning. “I guess not.”

She glances behind me again. “I should get going. It was…” Hesitation lingers for a few seconds between us. “It was a surprise to see you. But it was good.”

Wetting my lips, I nod. “It was nice seeing you too. I’m glad you got the top spot. You earned it.” Her eyes widen slightly before they go back to normal. She starts walking around me, but I don’t let her get far before I say, “Are you happy, Nora?”

Looking at me from over her shoulder, I notice the surprise in her eyes. “Yeah, I am.”

I nod once.

She adds, “Are you?”

My lips part, a small exhale escaping them before I shove my hands into the pockets of the hoodie I took from Kyler this morning. “I think for the first time since I had to leave, I am.”

We look at each other for a while before she dips her chin and walks away.

I let out a tiny breath and pull out my phone to see a text waiting for me.

Kyler: Reporters are surrounding the visitor lot, so I’m parked behind the old theater building.

Kyler: Be careful

Normally, the thought of reporters being here would fill me with dread, but a realization strikes me from the short conversation I had with an old friend.

My old life was built out of fear and hesitation, where I was a shadow of a girl compared to who I am now. Stanford was my dream then, but it isn’t what I want now. And as I walk toward the small lot where I know Kyler is waiting for me, I start to understand that dreams can change just as much as people can.

What I want now is sitting behind the steering wheel of a too-expensive car that I slip into the passenger seat of. What I want is for him to lean over, press a sweet kiss to my lips, and ask me how my day is.

And that’s exactly what he does.

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