Page 91 of Silent Partner (Pine Falls 3)

“Why don’t you sit down?” I found myself offering. She looked about done for, and I felt for her. She was too sweet, even if she was trying to make a case for Brant. I helped her to a chair in front of my desk and took the one next to her once she was seated. I even handed her a tissue from the box off my desk.

“Thank you.” She dabbed her eyes. Her eyes, just like Brant’s. So much sorrow lived within hers and his. And I’m sure in my own. It was as if sorrow had taken us all prisoner and none of us knew how to break free. Maybe if I knew the root of it all, it would help.

I bit my lip, unsure if I should proceed, but I was tired of all the secrecy. “Can I ask what John did?”

She wrung the tissue in her hands. “I thought you might ask that.”

“You don’t have to answer.”

“Yes, I do. You are owed at least that.” She reached for my hand, and when I hesitated, she reached farther and took it. “I plan to make you love me,” she said without apology.

I couldn’t help but smile at her acting tough. And, admittedly, I liked that she wasn’t planning on letting me go without a fight, because I did love her. I loved everyone who had hurt me, and that was what made it all so painful.

She held my hand between her own as if she held a treasure. “Sweet girl, I hardly know where to begin. You have no idea what it’s like to be married to someone for over forty years and feel as if you don’t know them.” She stopped and took a deep breath. “I say that, but the truth is, I do know him,” her voice broke off. “I know him better than myself, and that’s why it was such a shock when I found out what’d he’d done. That person wasn’t my John.” She let go of my hand to wipe her cheek but came right back for it.

I squeezed her hand, hating to see the kind of pain she was in. I could relate on some level. The Dani and Brant I knew would have never slept together.

She composed herself before she began again. “John was so much like Brant,” she said wistfully. “All he wanted to do was help the less fortunate and make our country, and even the world, a better and safer place for all. When he became a senator, he had such plans. Little did we know, Edward Copeland,” she spat his name, “had plans for him.”

I leaned forward. “What kind of plans?”

She looked up to the ceiling. “The kind that cost.”

I sat back, bracing myself.

She lowered her head and steadied herself. “You see, he used John to sponsor a bill that, unbeknownst to John, ended up not only lining the pockets of some politicians and corrupt foreign leaders but inadvertently cost the lives of some of our military members,” she stammered, hardly able to contain her emotion.

I gasped, not meaning to.

“I know,” she said. “It’s awful. John felt so ashamed for what he had done. But instead of owning up to the mistake, Edward said he could make it all go away. No one would ever be the wiser.”

“But it would cost him,” I guessed.

She nodded. “Yes, and the payments kept increasing. Basically, John was at Edward’s mercy. I’m not saying that John couldn’t have done the right thing at any time,” she growled. “He knew better, but he convinced himself the good he was doing outweighed the damage. He got to the point,” she curled her fist, “that he used our son and blackmailed our daughter-in-law.” Her tears flowed freely.

I handed her another tissue. “I’m so sorry he hurt you.”

“It’s not just me. He hurt our children. He hurt you. He knew our son didn’t love Jill, but he pushed him and pushed him. It’s no wonder Brant turned to Dani that night, knowing what he was facing for the rest of his life.”

I tensed up, not wanting to hear any more.

“I’m sorry; I don’t mean to further injure you. I only want you to understand.”

“I don’t understand,” I cried. “If he really loved me, he wouldn’t have done that.”

She reached out and smoothed my damp cheeks. “Do you think John loved me any less because of the bad choices he made?”

I shrugged, honestly not knowing the answer. I mean, if he really loved her, why would he do things that he knew would hurt her so much?

“Darling, do you think Dani loved you any less in that moment because of her choice?”

Oh. Ouch. I grabbed my stomach. Why did she have to ask that? I wanted to say yes and prove my point, but the truth was, “No,” I said in hushed tones.

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