Page 62 of Silent Partner (Pine Falls 3)

“For how long?”

“It seemed like forever at the time, but it was only a year before he proposed. I said no at first,” she said almost to herself.

“Why?”

She looked me straight in the eye. “Because I was scared to live in his world. And I thought maybe he was too good to be true.”

I bit my lip. “Was he?” I couldn’t help but ask.

She blew out a slow breath. “That is a difficult question, darling.”

I felt my cheeks pink. “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.”

She shook her head. “Oh, no. The way you feel about my son gives you every right to ask.”

My cheeks went from pink to red. “I don’t know—”

Her chin dipped. “Yes, you do, but you’re scared. And I don’t blame you. You should be.”

My eyes went wide and I swallowed hard.

“Getting involved with a Holland isn’t for the faint of heart. It is a world like you have never known.”

“Are you warning me to stay away?”

She reached across the table and patted my hand. “No, because to answer your earlier question, John . . .” she choked out, “for many years he was better than good. And our sons are the best men I know.”

Brant and Brock were good men. Brock, as far as I could tell, was the ideal husband. I remembered watching him last year as he refused to leave my sister’s side after losing the baby, even though she had been doing her best to push him away, thinking he had only married her because she was pregnant. It was apparent to everyone but her the pregnancy wasn’t the reason. Brock had always loved Dani—he had just been too stupid to do anything about it for a long time. That thought reminded me of who else had always loved my sister—Brant. Oh. I rubbed my heart as a terrible awareness began to crash through my mind. Thinking back now, he had seemed almost as devastated as Brock and Dani after she’d lost the baby. I had never thought about it until now because I had just started to see Tristan and had been wrapped up in him. But it was so obvious now. I saw the way Brant still looked at her, always had looked at her. It was probably why he’d acted so strange after Dani and Brock had announced they were pregnant. He wished it were him and Dani.

All these realizations had me pushing back my chair. “I should probably get back to work,” I said, flustered. My heart was pumping too fast, and I wanted to cry, but I refused to.

Sheridan looked taken aback by my abruptness. “I’ve said something to upset you, haven’t I?” she sounded worried.

“No. I just remembered something.” That wasn’t a lie. It was the awful truth. Brant might have had some feelings for me, but as always, I was second best. He’d probably helped me out because he was trying to prove to himself, and maybe even Dani and Brock, that he wasn’t in love with Dani. It explained his erratic behavior and all the back-and-forth. He was torn between what he knew he couldn’t have and the consolation prize. Dani probably knew too. When she was still in college, she’d even joked about dating Brant to try to get Brock to wake up. She knew how much I hated feeling second best, so she was trying to protect me, as always, without having to say the awkward truth out loud. Well, I had a news flash for both of them—I wasn’t going to be the consolation prize anymore. I didn’t need anyone’s protection or pity.

“Okay, darling.” She still seemed stunned by my behavior. “We can talk about the renovation plans later.”

I nodded, even though I knew the renovations would remain a dream. I wouldn’t be any more beholden to Brant than I had to be. I would do my best to make this place profitable and save up enough money to buy him out one of these days.

“I’m sorry to cut our lunch short. Thank you for being so honest with me. It was more helpful than you’ll ever know.”

She narrowed her eyes, as if she wasn’t sure what to make of my statement. “Feel free to call me anytime. I want us to be the best of friends.”

That sounded lovely, but dangerous to my heart. “Okay. Thank you.” I scurried away, needing a moment by myself to breathe. I walked as fast as I could back to my office. Once behind the closed door, I leaned against it and held my stomach, begging myself not to cry. This was good, I told myself. I was closing another wrong door. A single tear leaked out and down my cheek. Closing this door was so painful, it felt as if I’d slammed my finger in it.

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