Page 48 of Bad Boys After Dark - Brett
It felt wrong to hear Carson talk about his mojo. “Can I ask you something?”
“Always.” Carson motioned to a woman pushing a stroller. “I can’t wait to give Addy girl a baby sister or brother. Times have changed, haven’t they? This time last year I wouldn’t even have noticed a woman with a stroller.”
“Times have changed, all right.” This time last month I’d have been checking out every woman we passed. “You had a thing for Tawny forever, right?”
“Since college.” Carson and Tawny had been study partners in college, but they’d also had a secret sexual relationship.
“That’s a long time to carry a torch for a woman.” Brett didn’t know all the particulars, but he knew Tawny had ended things around graduation, and he’d never seen Carson happier than he’d been since Tawny had come back into his life.
Carson glanced over, sweat glistening on his forehead and cheeks. “She’s it for me, Brett. Always has been.”
“Yeah, I get that. I do.” Hell, I’ve been pursuing Sophie for years. “When Dylan met Tiffany, he was all in really fast, too. And Mick has been in love with Amanda since he first met her.”
They jogged along the side of the path to let a group of women who were speed walking pass by.
“That’s love, man,” Carson said. “What are you getting at?”
“I don’t know. I guess I’m wondering how you guys make it look so easy after all the shit we’ve been through.”
“Easy?” Carson scoffed. “It sucked not being able to connect with women on any real level for all those years in between college and when Tawny came back. But you go on. And then Tawny came back, and I swear, that wasn’t easy. There was a lot of hurt on both sides. But you know how we struggle to nail down some contracts and others just fall in our laps?”
“Sure.” Brett hated analogies, and Carson knew it, which meant this was the only way Carson could spell it out for him.
“The right relationship is a combination of both. You struggle to fit together in a way that’s right for both of you.”
“Compromise, Carson. Cut to the chase.”
“That’s just it. I can’t.” Carson grinned and kicked up his speed. “It’s not just compromise. It’s struggling through to find the compromises. Figuring out what battles you want to fight and how much of yourself you’re willing to change or give up to make things work.”
They jogged in silence for a few minutes as Brett mulled that over. “What if there’s something you want to change but you’re not sure you can?”
“If that thing is you hooking up with other women, it’s pretty much a deal breaker.”
“Jesus.” Brett stewed over what his brother thought of him.
“What’s really going on? There’s nothing about us that we don’t have the power to change.”
“Not true.” Anger bubbled up from his gut. “We can’t change that Lorelei is gone. We can’t change that our lives were ripped apart. We can’t change that—”
Carson grabbed his arm, causing him to stumble to a stop.
“What the hell?” Brett wrenched his arm free. Carson was staring at him with a dark expression. Carson didn’t do dark.
“All that stuff you just mentioned? That’s life, dude. And that anger I hear in your voice? It’s not about any of that shit. So tell me what’s going on because I’m trying to stay out of your business, but you’re like a roller coaster waiting to crash. And we’ve got too much riding on our company for that to happen.”
Brett paced. He dragged his forearm over his sweaty brow and said, “I’m with Sophie, okay? I mean, I’m with her. Staying at her place the last few nights, and before that, staying until she fell asleep. I’m—”
“Wait.” Carson laughed. “You’re with Sophie? Christ, Brett, why didn’t you start with that? I thought you were losing your mind.”
“Because I’m so fucking confused, and I’m going to lose her if I can’t get my act together.”
“Do not tell me you’re screwing around behind that woman’s back, because I’ll kick your ass from here to Mexico.”
