Jules repositioned himself on the couch and got her into a comfortable position then lowered his head to her arm where her scars were displayed. He gently kissed her wounds, a heightened sensation that made her nerves tingle rushed through her body as he lovingly kissed the blemishes as if they were beauty marks. Jules made her feel so special. Her nipp**les became erect and strained under the fabric of her top.
“Oh, Jules!” Amber groaned in ecstasy, savoring the pleasure of being loved, treasured.
“You’re so beautiful, Amber. I’ve always loved you,” he said, his voice hoarse. He kissed the tip of her nose to the bottom of her earlobe and she felt dizzy with excitement. The touch of his soft lips was a delicious sensation through her body. He didn’t just kiss her, he caressed her with his sweet lips. Oh, those magical lips of his. His lips were warm and tender on hers.
Amber could feel the hardness straining in his pants and delight rocked her body. Oh, she wanted him. She craved him so badly. Her hormones were racing all over the place. Her body was aroused for him. And his for hers. Perfect!
She reached down and stroked his erection through his pants enjoying the feel of his powerful hardness while he groaned with pleasure. He lowered his head to her brea**sts and kissed the mound of sensuous flesh.
Then just like that, Jules pulled away, leaving her breathless, her body throbbing out of control. Stunned, she gaped at him. “Jules,” she said, breathing heavy. “Why did you stop? Don’t stop. I want you, Jules. I need you!”
Jules got up. “I’m sorry, Amber, I…you really need your sleep,” he said, extending his hand to her to help her up.
She was still panting. Amber could see that he, too, was still aroused. She lovingly rubbed her belly and accepted his assistance. She knew he wanted her as much as she wanted him, but she was pregnant and he was obviously nervous about being with her—in her condition. Even if it was deemed safe for pregnant women to be intimate. But it was for the best. She didn’t know what she’d been thinking. No more relationships, Amber. They don’t last, remember?
Amber reached over and snaked her arms around Jules and he held her so firmly, so passionately and they went to bed, sleeping beside each other, holding each other, hugging each other and left it at that. Friends. Nothing more. Taking chances could prove too risky right now. So why did Amber feel like hell?
CHAPTER SIX
A month later, Amber sat in the waiting room of her therapist’s office flipping through magazines.
Since she had that dreadful nightmare and Jules ended up coming over in the middle of the night, Jules had stayed with her at the dwelling after she asked him to keep her company. She didn’t know why but she really didn’t want to be alone and he didn’t want her to be alone. He was so kind to follow her to her prenatal visits during the past month since they’d gotten reacquainted. She couldn’t express her appreciation enough.
Dr. Danye had been so supportive of Amber after her traumatic experience since the accident. She was dying to speak with him. She had to tell him not just about her progress regarding her coping strategies but also about having Jules back in her life. Amber was still having occasional nightmares of that horrible accident that scarred her body for life and scarred her emotionally so that had to be addressed first.
Amber told her therapist about her rekindled relationship with Jules and how he made her feel these days. She felt completely torn and wasn’t ready to accept everything that was happening to her emotionally. Jules knew what Amber looked like underneath her garments, the horrible secret she had hidden from him for fear of rejection and yet he cared about her anyway. He went out of his way to make her feel special. Loved. Appreciated. She, in turn, truly appreciated his kindness. But she’d been through emotional hell with her ex that it was hard to trust again.
At one time she would have been ecstatic over Jules’s devotion to her, but now Amber was finding she was a bit afraid of it in addition to finding his obvious love for her—and while she’s pregnant with someone else’s child!—completely tempting and seductive. How crazy was that?
Jules did everything and anything wonderful for her, from giving her the most amazing soothing, gentle back rubs and relaxing soft massages to getting her desired foods and other odd cravings in the middle of the night when he could have sent someone else or advised her where to go.
Then there was the dinner at Romero Manor with Jules’s family a couple weeks ago.
Amber was anxious at first about sitting down to dinner with the entire Romero clan but it was a godsend. A contrast from her emotionally-distant aunt. The Romeros were so giving and kind and loving. She enjoyed the warm family spirit and missed that with her own family after the tragedy. For the first time she’d had a sense of longing in every fiber of her being. Wishing they were her family. Wishing that her child would be a part of that loving bond. Wishing that Jules and she would end up…together forever. Yeah, right. Only in a perfect world!
The Romeros, Amber noticed, did a lot of things for themselves and often moved with regular folks as well as fellow wealthy people. Outside of their expensive mansions and impressive properties, luxury vehicles and prestigious businesses, they were actually like normal people. She could so relate to them on many levels. And Jules was no exception.
What had she done to deserve his wonderful attention? Amber was wrong about Jules in the past. She was both thrilled and terrified to be able to have a second chance with him though she wasn’t quite sure what their relationship was currently. They were just friends, weren’t they? Though deep inside Amber wished they were a couple again. A real couple. Over the past few weeks, Jules was so attentive to her—taking time away from his business to help her. Yet, she always felt that it might not even last because she had been traumatized while growing up into thinking she could never be worthy of being with someone as amazing as Jules.
Her doubts were always getting the best of her. And whenever there was a moment she felt good about herself or her relationships, that doubt would rear its ugly head in her mind and she would promptly back away psychologically.
“Dr. Danye will see you now, Amber,” the receptionist came back out into the waiting room to inform Amber.
“Thank you.” Amber dropped the magazine back on the table. The general waiting served a few offices in that area and had a few people sitting and waiting to see a professional. She never thought too much of it at the time but today she was acutely aware of being watched. A man with silver-streaked dark hair wearing a long dark trench coat and dark sunglasses apparently was gazing right in her direction. A grim expression pasted on his face. He slowly turned his head away but for some reason, Amber felt a sense of uneasiness creep over her. She rubbed her baby bump protectively and walked cautiously into the doctor’s office.
Don’t get paranoid, Amber. Nobody is watching you. No one is following you. It’s all in your mind. Hence, the reason she was still seeing a therapist so many years after the death of her family members. She hoped she was not having one of those paranoid panic attacks.
Through much counselling and focus on the present moment and psychotherapy, Amber was able to ease her distress. But her selective amnesia hadn’t changed surrounding that fatal night. “Maybe you don’t want to remember, Amber,” Dr. Danye once told her. He told her that sometimes the brain worked to protect a person from unpleasant memories in order to function. Especially if it was something horrific to remember that the victim could not change. Some had dubbed the phenomena “conscious memory loss.”
She wouldn’t know what she would have done if Dr. Danye wasn’t a part of her life. He had rescued her many times.
“Good to see you again, Amber,” Dr. Danye said as he walked slowly into his office, limping slightly. From the time she’d known him, he always walked with that odd gait. Something from his childhood. That was one of the reasons she felt so connected to Dr. Danye; he could relate to being scarred from an early age.
Dr. Danye closed the door behind him.
“How’s the baby?” He studied her with a warm smile.
“Great. She passed her obstetrician visit with flying colors. The baby is doing fine and is on schedule,” Amber beamed.
“Good. Glad to hear it. And how are you doing today?” He sat down at his desk. His back faced the door, which Amber found interesting. She’d always been told it was good to have an escape plan if you’re ever in a dangerous situation. She’d heard about some patients getting aggressive and lashing out at the doctor and the poor medical professional trapped in his own office without the ability to flee.
Oh, why had that awful thought crossed her mind? Sometimes she had way too much thought traffic traversing her mind. Think positive, Amber. Think only good thoughts.
“Getting better and better every day,” she chanted with an empowering smile. She was not going let negative thoughts or energy consume her and muddy up her perception of life. In the past she fought hard to overcome negative emotions and bitterness, especially over the unfairness of her family’s tragic deaths and the criminals responsible getting away with the murders. Dr. Danye told her that dwelling on that day for the rest of her life would not bring them back, it would only rob her of a future and that to honor their memory it was better that she moved forward because it’s what her parents would have wanted. He was probably right.