Page 89 of The Night Belongs To Fireman

He looked away, the muscles of his jaw working. “My part in this is done. Your father’s testimony is over.”

Desolation closed around her, a gray cloak blocking all light.

Somberly, he added, “If there was any way I could get your privacy back, I’d do it. Just know that I’m sorry.”

First he was angry at her, now he wanted to apologize? No, he’d apologized first, then unloaded on her, then apologized again. After announcing that he was leaving. Rachel felt as if she was jumping from cliff to cliff, with dizzying depths lurking beneath her. None of it made any sense to her.

She stuck out her chin. “I don’t accept your apology, as you have nothing to apologize for. I don’t accept your accusations either, since I don’t think I did anything wrong.”

He gave a frustrated shake of his head. “I guess that’s it, then.”

“I suppose.”

He strode across the room, slanting a cryptic look her way as he passed. A flush of heat passed over her, followed by a harsh chill. It felt … It felt as if he was trying to memorize her. As if he didn’t expect to see her again.

At the door of her apartment, he paused. The elevator door stood open, awaiting him. Rachel had the sudden thought that they never should have left the elevator. They should have stayed there, the two of them, and lavished love and pleasure on each other until there was no room left for anything else.

Fred skirted the elevator as if it held a snake pit, and made an abrupt turn to the left. “I’ll take the stairs.”

And then he was gone.

Chapter 26

Vader rested his forearms on the captain’s desk, a posture that made the muscles of his upper arms bulge like Popeye’s. Fred, surveying the stern lines of his captain’s rugged features, wondered if he was in trouble for some reason, but couldn’t bring himself to care very much. Everything seemed to have gone to shit, and he couldn’t quite figure out why.

“Do you need to take another leave?” Vader asked.

“No. I’m fine.” The doctors had told him to take a few more days, but Fred was itching to get back to his normal life. “Why?”

“Because Ella Joy, that’s why.”

“That’s not a real sentence.” For a pleasant moment, Fred flashed on a fantasy image of Ella Joy and Kale in a cage match from which neither one emerged.

“Oh, sorry, I’ll be sure to brush up on my grammar between fielding media requests and evicting your groupies from the hose tower.”

Fred winced. “Someone climbed up there?”

“Well, of course they did. How else could they mount the banner? We haven’t taken it down yet, so you can enjoy the moment.”

He hadn’t heard anything about a banner, but something told him it wasn’t good news. “What banner?”

“The banner with the phone number of Delta Nu Omega over at San Gabriel College.” Vader lowered his voice. “Which, by the way, I could have told you anyway.”

Fred saw an opportunity for revenge. “I thought you passed on your phone number collection to Ace. At least that’s what Cherie told me.”

But Vader couldn’t be rattled that easily. “I did pass it on. Cherie knows she’s all I want in a woman and always will be. But I dialed that number a lot of times, and some things don’t leave your brain just because you get married. But let’s get back to your messed-up life. We have a kidnapping, we have a fan club, and then there’s Rachel. What’s going on there?”

Fred stiffened. “Nothing’s going on. My leave is up and I’m ready to come back to work. I heard I missed a few USAR calls. I should have been here.”

Vader made a dismissive gesture. “They were handled. You’re not the only one who can be a hero, you know.”

“I’m not a fucking hero,” Fred ground out.

“Really? According to my TV, you are.”

Maybe it was the twinkle in Vader’s eye, or the sympathy on his rough face, but Fred had just about reached the end of his rope. “Let me ask you something. If you were kidnapped, would you want Cherie to bail you out? You know, pay the ransom or whatever?”

Vader tilted his head thoughtfully. “If I were kidnapped … let’s say by the entire Taliban, because that’s what it would take …” Fred rolled his eyes, already regretting that he’d asked the question. “My main concern would be Cherie’s feelings. Face it, that’s my biggest concern in most situations. I would hate to make her worry. Would I want her to pay the ransom? Sure, if that helped ease her mind. She’d want to do something. You know what gets me, Fred?”

Fred shook his head.

“I know how much Cherie worries when I’m out on a call, but damn if she’ll ever let me see it. She puts on that cheery little smile when I head off to work. She doesn’t want me worrying about her worrying. Know what I mean? Women are just as strong as we are, Fred. That means they’ll fight like demons for someone they love.”

Fred stared at his captain and friend while trying to make sense of his words. Did Rachel love him? Was that why she’d done the interview? I chose to help someone who matters to me, she’d said. He’d been so wrapped up in his own feelings of failure that he hadn’t considered her point of view. Not really.

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