Page 86 of Hidden Agendas (Tempting SEALs 4)

“Gotcha, Kell.” Ian’s smile was knowing, while Kira just shook her head and winked back at Emily with heavy suggestiveness before she followed Ian to the door.

“Girlfriend, good luck.” Kira waggled her brows suggestively. “And remember, man candy is hard to come by. Enjoy it while it’s willing.”

Enjoy it while it’s willing. Emily snorted at the thought as she flashed Kell an irritated glance. It would be okay if the willing cand

y was just a tad bit easier to get along with when he got his own shorts in a wad. It wasn’t like she had forgotten the rubber.

As Ian and Kira passed through the door, Kell caught it with his hand and closed it with a bang. Emily’s brows arched as he turned his back to her, set the alarm, then faced her once again.

He crossed his arms over his chest and a dark brooding frown creased his brow. Oh yeah, willing man candy. How could she have missed that one?

“You know, you could save yourself all this ill temper quite easily,” she told him mockingly.

His nostrils flared and his frown deepened. “And how would you I suggest I do that?”

She lifted her shoulders in a dismissing shrug. “Don’t forget the rubbers next time; then you won’t have to worry about all your powerful little soldiers roaming around untended.”

Emily didn’t think his expression could have darkened more. But it did.

“You think I’m upset because I forgot to wear a rubber?” he grated out.

“What else would I think?” She uncurled her legs and rose to her feet. “You’ve been like an ill-tempered bear all day. To my knowledge the only thing I could have done to piss you off was my inability to say no while you were buried inside me.”

His gaze flared. Darkened.

“I’m not angry over the condom.” A muscle flicked in his jaw. “Not that I’m pleased with my own lack of self-control.”

She nodded as though in understanding. “Yeah. I can see where that would bother you.”

“I’m in love with you, Emily.”

“Control would impor—” She stopped. Blinked. “What did you say?”

“I’m guessing I’ve been in love with you for years.” He gave his head a hard, furious shake. “You think your father spied on you over the years? You should have seen me skulking around your apartment and then this condo. Following you to the library and to school and back and telling myself it was just because I didn’t have anything better to do. And knowing all along that I was lying to myself.”

Emily suddenly felt off balance, as though she had stepped into a reality that made no sense to her. This was the same Kell she had known for so long. The one she had lusted for, ached for, fantasized about. The one she had fallen in love with, and suddenly he was the man she had dreamed of.

“I don’t understand.” She shook her head jerkily. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I couldn’t tell myself, Emily.” He pushed his fingers through his hair as he kept a careful distance between them. “I couldn’t admit to myself that I was so desperate for you that I was worse than any stalker could have been. Because I was so damned scared of losing you. Then Fuentes took you.” A grimace contorted his face as his fists clenched at his sides for long seconds. “When he took you I went insane. When I crashed inside that dirty little shack and saw you, pumped on that damned Whore’s Dust and trying so hard to keep the other girls calm, a part of me knew I couldn’t run any longer.”

She didn’t remember it. Over the past months, there had been vague memories, shifts in the darkness of her mind about that time, but never anything solid.

“I knew when the limo was forced off the road that you would come for me,” she told him then. “I remember that much. Something inside me said that you would save me.”

“I saved you.” His eyes were so dark they were like gems glittering in his face as he came to her then, his hands framing her face, his thumbs smoothing over her lips. “But you were fighting to save yourself as well. You didn’t cower, and when I saw that, you stole the rest of my heart, Emily. My little fox, you made me burn for you until I thought I’d turn to ash.”

Emily felt her lips tremble, felt the emotion surging through her soul at his revelations.

“Then why are you so angry?”

“I’m not angry, chère,” he whispered. “I have to protect you. Soon it will all be over. I have to keep my head clear. I have to keep enough distance to make certain there are no mistakes made. I survived Tansy’s death and the death of the child she carried. But Emily, if I lost you, I don’t know if I could survive.”

She saw that in his eyes now. Saw it in his earlier actions. He had been distancing himself from his emotions, not from her. Always watching. Tense. Ready.

Dear God, what she had done in forcing him to return here, in refusing to hide?

“I’ll hide,” she cried brokenly. “We’ll go to the safe house.” She could feel her lips trembling, feel the fear for him suddenly overwhelming her. “Whatever you want to do.”

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