Page 30 of Julien (Confessions 2)

Robbie didn’t speak, but when Priest turned his head and they locked eyes with one another, the worry in those steely depths was evident. Priest’s concern for Julien was written all over his face, and Robbie had to wonder if it matched his own.

“Hey.”

“Hello.” Priest ran his eyes down the robe, and his lips curved an inch. “Are you okay?”

Robbie nodded and gestured over his shoulder to their bedroom. “Julien, he…”

“I know. He’s restless tonight.”

“Yes,” Robbie said. “He, uh…he called out her name but then went back to sleep.”

Priest slowly nodded and sighed before he reached up into a cabinet and pulled a bottle of whiskey from it. Robbie leaned back against the counter and watched as he poured two glasses, and then held one out.

Robbie took it and downed it in one gulp. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Priest said, and did the same. After he placed the glass on the counter, he frowned. “Things are going to get rough around here over the next week or so.”

Robbie nodded and rubbed at his arms. “I figured. I hate this for him. Hate seeing him suffer. Tonight he seemed happy to talk about her. You don’t think I pushed him too hard, do you?”

“No.” Priest's voice was more solemn than ever, which told Robbie just how serious this was. “He enjoyed talking about her with you, I could tell. But it’s stirred up some of the more painful memories too. I know it’s hard to see him like this, and it’s only going to get worse, but it’s his process.”

“Process?”

“Yes. It’s how he’s able to function the rest of the time.” Priest rubbed a hand over his forehead, and then walked around the island to go and look out the balcony doors. “This is the one time of the year that he really allows himself to feel what happened. To remember and acknowledge it. The rest of the time, he is very good at compartmentalizing. Locking it away.”

Robbie wanted to ask Priest what exactly had happened to Jacquelyn, but knew that, like Julien had once said about Priest, Julien’s story was for him to tell, and Robbie just had to be there when he was ready to tell it.

“I’m worried about him,” Robbie said, and walked over to stand beside Priest. The twinkling lights of the city were beautiful, and while you could see the cars below, not a sound could be heard, making the night a peaceful one. “I wish there was something I could do to help him.”

Priest turned and put his hands on Robbie’s shoulders. “There is. He’s going to drive himself into the ground this week to drown out everything else. He has that interview with the Culinary Institute, and the restaurant to organize for opening night. He will use all of that to get him through to next weekend, and we just have to let him go. Let him do it his way and be there when he stops, when he finally looks for someone to lean on. Trust me, you’re doing something by just being here. By being willing to come with us and help me get him through next week.”

Robbie bit down on his lip. “I guess.”

“It’s true. Now go back to bed and sleep. That’s the other way you help him. You give him someone to hold on to when he needs it.”

“So do you.”

Priest dropped his hands by his sides. “Do you forget where you found me tonight?”

“No, but… Okay, then. What do you give him?” Robbie asked, wondering if Priest would respond. But he should’ve known better. Transparency was the key to Julien and Priest, and to the relationship being nurtured between the three of them.

You want to know something, ask. Robbie couldn’t remember how many times they’d both told him that.

“I give him someone who understands that life is anything but fair, and someone who loves him regardless of his past. Perhaps even because of it. Because that is what made him the man he is today.”

Priest brushed a kiss across Robbie’s forehead, and the move was so sweet, and so unlike him, that it made a shiver race up Robbie’s spine.

“We all have a role here, Robert. No one’s is greater or more important than the other. It’s just different. That’s why we work, and will continue to work, if we’re honest with one another. Now go and sleep.”

“And what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to sit in there and watch over the two of you.”

Robbie’s heart practically skipped a beat at that response, as he walked toward the bedroom with Priest by his side. “You know, Julien told me something today that I don’t believe. Not for a second.”

“And what’s that?”

“That you hated him the second time you met. The night he asked you out on a date. But that’s not true, is it?”

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