Page 73 of Trusting Liam (Taking Chances 2)

“This is probably going to be so jumbled and confusing, but I’ll try to make it so you understand. Before I met Rhys, I needed control for a completely different reason from when I met you. My mom is a very strong-willed person, and that’s something I’ve always admired about her. I’m just like my dad, but having a strong will was definitely the one thing I’ve taken from my mom, and I took pride in being that way. After my first real kiss I realized just how vulnerable I felt during it, and it made me really uneasy because that wasn’t the kind of person I was. So I made sure from then on that there wasn’t a way for me to feel like that again. I always took control after that. With Rhys, there was something about him that made it so easy to just let him take control. I never once had that vulnerable feeling, but I still fought him because I had been unknowingly trying to make all my relationships be just like my parents’. Do you remember I told you that I used to want what they have, and then I realized that that kind of love didn’t exist?”

I thought for a second, then nodded. “Ice cream shop.”

“Right. Rhys was what made me realize that . . . or think that. But I never unders

tood that I’d been trying to force my relationships to be perfect until I talked to Rhys about it last night. To be honest, I always thought it was only Kira who did that. So with Rhys, losing control meant no longer controlling how our relationship went, then after him, I guess it was the same as before. I didn’t want to go back to feeling vulnerable with any guy; but then I met you, and you demanded control from the start. The second you touched me I was already completely lost in you in a way I had never been, and it absolutely terrified me. I thought it was because you were like Rhys, but Brian is actually the person who made me see the differences. Everything was easy with Rhys, but everything was terrifying with you because what I felt with you was more than I ever felt with him, and I had thought at one point that he was the last person I would ever love. So it wasn’t the similarities between you and Rhys that scared me, and it wasn’t that I didn’t stand a chance of keeping control with you. It was that I had finally found the guy I was meant to be with, and after what had happened with Rhys, I was too scared to let myself feel anything for you. Letting myself love again was the hardest and scariest thing I’ve ever done.”

“Does it still scare you?”

“No,” she breathed. “Liam, I crave the way you make me feel and the way you love me.”

“And do you trust me not to hurt you now?” I asked as I pushed her feet to the side and leaned forward so my mouth was less than an inch from hers.

“I wouldn’t be here telling you all of this if I didn’t trust you with my heart.”

I captured her lips with mine, and like before, her fingers gripped my shirt, then flattened against my chest as she pushed me away.

“Wait, wait. Last thing that you didn’t know,” she whispered against my lips. “I have to tell you about Juarez and why Kira and I are really in California.”

“Yeah.” I sat back and looked at her. “Who the fuck is Juarez? No one ever answered that question for me.”

She waited until I was back against my side of the couch and rubbing her feet again before she started talking. “Juarez is the leader of a gang that my dad and uncle Mason infiltrated. To make a long story—that I don’t actually even know—short, the gang wanted payback after my dad got most of their members thrown in jail. The remaining members kidnapped my mom right before my parents were supposed to get married. Obviously she got away from them, and the rest of the gang members were thrown in prison as well. A few months before Kira and I moved here, my dad started receiving threats from someone in the gang, or close to them, that were directed at Kira and me. Moving to California without our parents was just a precaution, but Dad thought it was necessary since a handful of the members were being released within just months of each other. Then last week we had a visitor from Juarez.”

“You what?” I yelled.

“Let me keep explaining!” After Kennedy gave me a quick rundown on some kid named Matthew, and the hours she, Kira, and Rhys had all spent at the police station giving statements, she sighed heavily and held her hands up to emphasize her uncertainty. “We don’t know if there are any more people working for Juarez yet, but I have a feeling that Matthew was it. All that said, I don’t know when Kira and I will be allowed to move back to Florida, and that used to upset me, but not so much anymore. Even though there are so many things I hate about California, moving here was the best thing that could have happened because it brought me back to you.”

“Aw,” I drawled sarcastically. “You must like me or something.”

“You like that last little cheesy part?” she asked with a wink.

“Love it. Best part of everything you just told me.” Kennedy kicked at my stomach, but I caught her foot and started rubbing it again. “Now tell me why the hell didn’t I know about all this Juarez bullshit before?”

The teasing look that had briefly crossed her face quickly left at my question. “I didn’t want you to worry when Kira and I weren’t really worried. Mom and Dad said the threats increased for a while when some of the members started being released, but they’ve had the police watching them. Besides, like I told you before, my dad made sure we knew how to escape bad situations if they happened, and Matthew definitely wasn’t a bad situation. It scared me when he first showed up and started talking, but as soon as he started sobbing it was pretty funny.”

“How can you talk about this like it’s not that big a deal?”

“Because it’s not to us,” she said on a laugh. “I wasn’t scared when my parents told us about the threats, and I’m not scared now.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever understand how your mind works,” I mumbled.

“Who said I wanted you to?”

Grabbing her ankles, I pulled her closer until I could wrap my arm around her waist to haul her onto my lap. “I like when you act like you don’t care,” I said against her throat before placing a kiss there.

“Oh, you like it now?” she teased as she turned so she was straddling me. “I don’t remember you liking it about six months ago.”

I made a confirming sound in my throat. “You were always so bad at lying to me anyway, it was funny to watch you try to make me believe you didn’t want me. But now I’ve gotten you to admit your feelings, so your attempts at not caring are adorable.”

“Adorable?” she said, deadpan.

“Fucking adorable, Moon.”

I slowly inched her shirt off her body, and let it fall to the floor before reaching for the back of her bra, but my hands stilled when I looked down. Her black lace bra looked like it was barely able to hold her in, and was filmy enough that I was able to catch a glimpse of something I knew hadn’t been there before.

“Kennedy . . .” I began; my voice had dropped low and was barely audible.

“If you say they’re adorable, I will castrate you.”

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