Page 69 of Moonstruck
“Do you think you could ever love me?” Zane blurted.
Asa frowned. “I don’t really know what love is. I want to say yes, but I don’t know what it feels like, so I don’t know if I can do it.”
Zane couldn’t stop the words from tumbling past his loose lips. “It feels like your heart skips when the person walks in a room. It feels like you’re sad when they leave, like you think about them when they’re not around, and you care about their day and what happened to them. That you don’t want them to be unhappy. That you’d be unhappy if it saved them being sad.”
Asa studied Zane’s face, a little breathless when he asked, “Is that how you feel about me, Lois?”
Zane screwed his face into an expression of mock seriousness, doing his best to imitate Asa’s sexy talk voice. “I feel like if I tell you that, it might change the power dynamic of this relationship.”
The way Asa kept looking at him was making Zane feel goosebumpy. “I think we’re long past that.”
Zane hated how vulnerable he suddenly felt, but he nodded anyway, “Yeah, it’s how I feel about you. But you better not hold this against me tomorrow. This shit is going to be super embarrassing in the morning.”
“You being in love with me is embarrassing?” Asa asked.
Zane snorted. “It is if I’m the only one, yeah.”
“I can assure you, lots of people are in love with me,” Asa teased.
Zane slapped his shoulder. “I’m serious. You can’t make fun of me for this.”
Asa’s hands came up under Zane’s arms, dragging him high enough to reach his lips in a slow, almost lazy kiss that made Zane’s toes curl. “If I can love anybody, Lois, it will be you. No question. I don’t know if I will feel all of those things you mentioned. We haven’t been apart since we met. But I don’t ever want you to be sad. I want to kill people who hurt you. I spend half my day thinking of how I can’t wait to be inside you again, to fill you up, leave my marks all over you. I knew days ago that, even if my family didn’t accept you, I wouldn’t let you go.”
“Even Avi?” Zane asked, voice barely a whisper.
Asa gave a slow nod. “Even Avi. But I think he’d come around.”
Zane didn’t want to be the reason Asa and Avi didn’t spend time together. “I hope so.”
Asa narrowed his eyes. “This seems like a good time to mention this. You know we’re probably all going to live together. My brother and I just like to be…near each other. I know that seems weird to people. Believe me, I’ve seen the rumors, read the headlines. But it’s not like that.”
“Like what?” Zane asked, trying to follow the conversation.
“We’re notthatclose.”
Asa made an obscene gesture that had Zane’s eyes going wide. “Oh. Do people think that you have sex with people, like, together?”
“Oh, we’ve definitely had sex with people, like, together, just not…crossing swords. I don’t want to fuck my brother, but that doesn’t mean we don’t like to share.”
“Are you going to want to…share me?” Zane asked, far too drunk to give this conversation the attention it deserved. His dick had one hundred percent taken over all of the thinking, and the idea of having not one Asa but two was something Zane’s smaller head was very much on board with.
“Is that something you want?” Asa asked, not sounding as jealous as Zane had imagined he would.
“It’s not fair to ask me this question when I’m drunk and horny,” Zane said honestly. “Would you do that? Want me to have sex with other men?”
“Other men? Hell no. But Avi isn’t ‘other men.’ Avi’s like the other half of me. It’s not a deal breaker.”
“Doesn’t he have a boyfriend? Jericho’s brother?”
Asa snorted. “Not according to him. But yeah, probably. You’d like Felix, though. He’s kind of like one of those super small and pretty but highly venomous fish you see in the ocean. I think if my brother ever admits they’re perfect for each other, the four of us could be happy together. In whatever way works for us. For all of us. Is that going to be a problem for you?”
Zane wasn’t exactly sure what Asa was asking. Was he okay with fucking his brother? Was he okay with fucking Felix? Was he okay with Felix fucking Asa? There were too many bisecting lines in this conversation. But like Asa said, none of those things were exactly a deal breaker. Except one. “Only if Avi hates me. I don’t know if I can handle living with somebody who looks like you but who can’t stand me.”
“I think my brother will find it very hard to not like you, Lois.”
Zane looked around. “So, there will be four of us living here or at the house?”
Asa nodded. “Yeah, maybe. Does that bother you?”
