Page 41 of Unhinged
“This,” he said, sounding frustrated. “Crazy. Possessive. I know my brain doesn’t work the way it’s supposed to, but it never really mattered before because I knew why I was put on this planet. My dad said the world needs people like me to maintain order. Balance. But I never thought I’d meet somebody and feel the way I feel when I’m with you.”
“I like that you’re possessive.”
Adam scoffed. “You won’t be saying that when you’re chained to the bed.”
Noah lifted a hand to cup Adam’s face. “I like the idea of being chained to your bed.”
Creases formed on Adam’s brow, his expression almost pained. “I won’t let you go.”
“I’m not trying to leave,” Noah said. “But you don’t get to leave either. You don’t get to walk away when you’re done with me.”
“I will never be done with you,” Adam promised.
Noah shook his head. “You can’t promise that. We’re strangers. You know nothing about me.”
“I know you’re mine. I know it. Deep down, in that part of my brain that doesn’t care what is right or how society dictates how people choose a mate. I chose you. I want you. Just you. My brain has picked you, and now, I can’t undo it. You’re trapped. With me. For life.”
Noah’s heart hammered in his chest. “Nobody has ever picked me. Most people don’t even notice me—”
“Bullshit,” Adam said, shaking his head.
Noah gave a half smile. “It’s partially my own fault. I never wanted to be noticed. In foster care, nothing good ever comes from standing out. That’s just the way it is.”
“That’s my fault.”
It wasn’t a question, just a blanket statement of guilt, like he knew he should feel bad, even though he wasn’t capable.
Noah sighed. “I’d already been through the worst things in my life. I was just lucky enough not to remember. I don’t know if I’ll stay lucky, though. I’ve been having nightmares, flashes of memories. I keep them out of my head with pills and booze, but, eventually, they’re going to break free. And I don’t know who I’ll be after that happens. So, you should be careful of the promises you make.”
Adam dropped his head, kissing Noah softly. “The thing about being raised in a house full of psychopaths? We’re pretty accepting of other people’s crazy. I think I’ll be alright.”
Noah didn’t know what any of this meant long term. Maybe Adam would tire of him, maybe he wouldn’t. It was all lip service until they both just did the hard work of staying, of making it happen. There were people in arranged marriages who stayed together for years. Who was to say Adam and Noah couldn’t make their relationship work off of kinky sex and a shared understanding that neither of them would ever be mentally sound?
“I’m hungry,” Noah said, needing to break the tension.
“Do you like Greek food? There’s a twenty-four hour place that delivers.”
Noah nodded. “Yeah, that sounds amazing.”
Adam jumped up, padding naked down the stairs, probably to find his phone. Noah rolled over and buried his face in Adam’s pillow, inhaling deeply. This was definitely an upgrade from the trailer.
* * *
They ate sitting cross-legged on Adam’s bed, both of them sharing bits of food with the other. There was plenty to choose from as Adam had ordered what looked like half the menu to the house. After the dishes were cleared away and they were both stuffed, they lay in bed, in the dark, Noah’s head on Adam’s thigh as he combed fingers through his hair.
"Can I ask you something?”
Noah startled as Adam’s words broke the silence. Between his full belly and recent orgasm, he was practically in a food coma, lingering somewhere between sleeping and awake. He blinked his eyes open, struggling to adjust to the darkness. It was a moonless night and not even the glow from the kitchen downstairs could penetrate the shadows of the loft.
“Sure,” he mumbled, snagging Adam’s free hand and playing with his fingers.
“How’d you find me?”
Noah’s heart rate shot up. It was only a matter of time before Adam’s curiosity got the best of him, but still, Noah hesitated to say it out loud, though he had no reason to hide his detective skills. “Does it matter?”
“Yeah, of course, it does. We’re so careful at covering our tracks. It would be good to know if we’re missing something,” Adam reasoned.
Noah sighed. “Yeah, but you have to remember, I had something others didn’t… I saw you.”
