Page 47 of Daddy's Christmas Rescue
And I just stood there, shaking, wishing I could be anywhere else but here, and also wishing he’d just…do something. Look away, say it was too much, laugh. I could have handled that. Expected it, even.
But he just kept staring. Like I was something precious. Like he couldn’t look away.
I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hide the worst bits. The way the lace pulled at my hips. The way my thighs bulged over the hem. I wanted to cover up. I wanted to run. I wanted him to touch me so bad I thought I might die from it.
I didn’t even realize I was crying until the first tear hit my cheek.
He stood up then, slow and careful, like he was afraid if he moved too fast I’d bolt. His hands were still clenched. His jaw was sharp, eyes even sharper.
“Come here,” he said. Not a question.
I couldn’t move.
He crossed to me in two strides. Big, broad, so much taller than me. He didn’t reach out. He didn’t touch. He just stood there, letting me feel how much space he took up.
“You’re shaking.”
I nodded, because I couldn’t trust my voice.
“You’re not in trouble,” he said, softer now. “But I want to know if you’re scared. Tell me the truth.”
I swallowed. “I’m not scared of you.”
He let out a breath. I saw his shoulders drop, just a little. “What are you scared of?”
I stared at the floor. “That you’ll laugh. Or change your mind. Or tell me to go put the pajamas back on because this is wrong.”
He made a low sound, almost a growl. “Look at me, Holly.”
So I did.
His eyes were so blue it hurt to look at them.
“You think I don’t want you?” He shook his head, then reached up, slow, and brushed his thumb over my cheek where the tear had landed. “You have no idea, baby girl.”
I nearly sobbed at that. “But I’m not like Amanda. I’m not… I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to be what you want.”
He smiled. Not big, but real. “Amanda wore silk and heels and made it look easy. But she never wanted me. Not really. She never let herself need anything, and above all I need to be needed so badly. And that’s the last time we’re ever gonna mention her ever again.”
He stepped even closer. The heat coming off him made me dizzy. “I want you. All of you. The part that needs teddy pajamas and the part that needs this.”
He traced his finger along the edge of the lace, not quite touching skin. My breath hitched.
He leaned in, so close I could feel his breath on my face. “You’re beautiful,” he said. “You’re perfect. I want you so bad I can’t even think straight.”
I made a noise, The way he touched me didn’t feel anything like careful, but it was. Every move was slow, deliberate. Nothing rushed. He was so big and I was so not. My heart thudded so loud I was sure he could hear it.
He didn’t kiss me at first. He just touched my face, thumb gentle on my cheek, then along my jaw. His hands were shaking, which made no sense. He was always so steady. “You sure about this?” His voice was thick, a little rougher than usual.
I nearly lost my nerve right there, but I nodded. “Yes. Please.”
He closed his eyes for a second, like he was holding himself together, then leaned in and kissed me. Not soft. Not tentative. It was the kind of kiss that made my knees buckle, even though I was already standing right in front of him. I clung to his shoulders, silk and lace and bare skin pressed between us, and it felt… right. More right than anything ever had.
“You’re perfect,” he whispered. “You know that?”
I shook my head. I didn’t know. Not even a little. But I wanted to.
He kissed me again, slower this time, then trailed his lips down my neck, his hands moving so carefully over my back, along the edge of the lace. Every nerve ending felt like it was on fire. My breath kept catching. I couldn’t stop trembling, but he didn’t seem to mind.
