Page 37 of Scent Of Obsession
“No. I —” I abruptly laid the fork back on the table, sucking in all the air. “I don’t have a boyfriend. Why would you need to worry, anyway?”
“I want you dedicated to your task.” He paused, holding his glass between his fingers. He moved the red garnet wine slightly like a bloody sea. “Plus, the sooner you’re done, the sooner we can both get back to our lives.”Right.“How did the meeting go with Patrick today?”
“Fine,” I lied, intertwining my fingers together under the table to hide my nervousness.
“I saw you. I know what happened.”
He sipped his glass calmly, in contradiction to his glacial tone that froze my insides. I wanted to defend myself. To reply that I’d get the job done despite our disagreement. I needed the Devil’s Corpse to make my perfume more than anything in the world, and something in my gut screamed that Radcliff wouldn’t be as lenient with me if I started posing problems with his staff. But I couldn’t speak. Maybe the sisters were right. I was vain and too proud.
His mouth set in a grim line. “Do you know what I said to Patrick?”
“It won’t happen again,” I excused myself.
“I told him…” He stopped, and my heartbeat echoed in my chest loudly. “I told him he’d do as you please. That you’re the one deciding.” Radcliff kept his stare on me, probably aware of the way my eyes had widened. “So you can expect your oils to be delivered this week and whatever else you need. I believe you had a list?”
“What? You defended me?” I was breathless. Patrick was a respected man with more experience than I—how could he have chosen me instead?
“I can be very convincing when I want something, little witch. As much as I can be very cruel when I don’t obtain it.’’ A ghost of a smile spread over his face. The kind of smile where you don’t want to be the victim of Radcliff’s wrath.
“I don’t understand… I mean, why—”
“From now on, I want you to believe in yourself. Don’t disappoint me.”
“You truly believe in me?” A warm feeling filled my belly. It was butterflies. I was touched by his words despite the spite in them. Perhaps because apart from my mother, no one ever truly did. Perhaps because Radcliff’s approval was so hard to gain that it meant more.
“That doesn’t matter either. You’ll never achieve anything if you let anyone dictate what you can or cannot do.”
“I don’t,” I tried to convince myself. “People and their words don’t get to me.”
“I don’t like liars,” he countered. “You use your pride to pretend to be untouchable, but you’ll just end up mediocre doing so. Don’t deny what’s inside of you. Use it. Use everything. The good and the bad. If you want to create something exceptional, you can’t lie with your feelings.”
“Says the man known to not have an ounce of humanity,” I shot back, knowing he was right. Lying wasn’t just about words. It was about denial. Denying your emotions, being a coward to them. But letting the truth out was far more dangerous and painful sometimes.
“Which says a lot about me,” he mocked.
A bad feeling crept down my spine as long as a strange fascination. Radcliff had used his feelings to create his empire, until none remained inside of him. Until he had reached the status of excellence. He belonged to the category I coveted.
“So, you were human, once upon a time.” Our eyes connected, and I took the first bite of the white truffle among the red meat and pretentious vegetables—the gourmet kind, served with colors and savors. “What happened?”
“Maybe I’m just born this way.”
I smiled. “Evil isn’t born. It’s made. Just like inhumanity. It’s all about choices.” Usually, the greatest of the villains had to sacrifice the person they loved the most to gain their ultimate power. They sacrificed their biggest strength—their heart.
“To choices.” He raised his glass to make a toast.
I did the same, entrapped by the depths in his eyes. I tasted the alcohol I swore to never drink. The liquid corrupted my lips. The red cherry and leather notes infused my nostrils. He took another first from me.
The rest of the dinner was filled with a blossoming silence. Not the heavy silence you want to escape from, but the strangely appeasing one that intensifies the present moment. The one which leaves the floor to our souls, letting them share much more privacy than just words.
Sometimes, we would swivel our eyes toward each other. In the midst of this otherworldly atmosphere, nervousness surged in my veins. I bet he felt it too, that invisible pull that pushed us further toward the other. The way his eyes dipped down and lingered on my lips could have fooled me for attraction—if he wasn’t him. But he couldn’t possibly want me.
By the end of dinner, Radcliff rose up without a word and ambled toward me. I got up from my seat, our bodies almost colliding, with only a few inches separating us. That proximity was enough for a bolt of electricity to travel between us.Vanilla. I turned my gaze away under the smell of the new scent I’d picked up. Radcliff’s odor was attractive to me. Too attractive, that each note lured me into his darkness.
“Why are you afraid of the dark?” he asked genuinely with the rasp of his voice.
What happened with the sisters and my wicked childhood was my secret. And if anyone could understand the burden of burying secrets in the most secluded part of our mind, it would probably be Radcliff.
“For the same reason you fear light,” I mused. “The unknown.”
