Page 5 of His Kind of Beautiful
Chapter Three
“Wow. Who knew you could cook like that?” Leona pushed her plate away and sat back against the chair with a contented sigh.
“Are you sure you can’t eat a little more,bellezza?” Tony asked gently.
Leona shot him a shy smile. “No, honestly, I’m stuffed. I haven’t had much of an appetite lately. I think that’s the most I’ve eaten in—well, since that night.”
Tony sighed, sitting back in his own chair, cradling the glass of red wine in his hand, and leveled his gaze at her. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Leona tensed. “Why?” She didn’t bother pretending she didn’t know what Tony was talking about.
“Because you need to talk to someone. Marissa told me you refused to speak to that counselor Gavriil sent to you.”
Leona stood up so abruptly from the table, the chair she was sitting on rocked backward. “What else have you all been saying about me behind my back?” She threw her arms in the air. “What a stupid question, huh? You don’t need to say it behind my back because you’re quite capable of saying it in front of me. You all think I’m fucked-up and beyond help.”
Tony stood up, too, throwing his napkin down on the table. “Damn it, Leona, that’s the second time you’ve said that, and I still have no fucking clue what you are talking about. When? When did we say you were fucked-up and beyond help?”
“That night at Gavriil’s house, when Angelo—when you—when he.”
“The night I snapped that bastard’s neck,” Tony snarled. “Yeah, I remember that night vividly. You were covered in blood and that piece of shit had a gun to your fucking head. I remember every little thing about that moment. But what I do not remember saying is that you were fucked-up!”
“Gavriil did!” Leona knew she was screaming now, but she couldn’t stop. “He told you what you had done was righteous, and he said Leona was fucked-up. Those words exactly. And that he had no idea how to fix it. To fix me!”
Tony frowned for a moment then groaned, his eyes closing for a moment. “Fuck, Leona. You were half out of your mind with fear! You heard it wrong. I was on my knees, holding you, telling you it was going to be okay, and Gavriil said he had fucked up with you and he had no idea how to fix whathehad done.”
Leona jolted back. No, that couldn’t be right. She was on the outside of the family, always on the outside.
“It doesn’t make sense what you’re saying. Gavriil never really cared about what happened to me. Hell, I was only ever someone who worked for the Carlisi family. Never a part of it, right?”
She turned and moved toward the living room, but she didn’t get very far. For a big man, Tony moved fast and silently. She’d only taken three steps away from the table before he was standing right in front of her.
“That’s bullshit and you know it.” The anger in his tone matched the fire flashing in his eyes. “Sofia and John only ever treated you like family. They treat all of us like family.”
“True, it was the one they consider their son that treated me like the whore I am!”
Leona inhaled sharply, and shock slammed through her. What the hell had she said? That wasn’t what she was feeling, was it? She’d been the one to go to Gavriil with the idea of using Angelo’s apparent attraction to her to their advantage. Something in her expression must have clued Tony into her plan to run, and he pulled her into his arms.
“No, no!” She struggled against him, desperate to get away from him, to get away. “Please, let me go, just let me go!”
But Tony didn’t do as she asked. In fact, he seemed to hold her tighter. When her legs gave out beneath her, he simply dropped to the floor with her, pulling her onto his lap. The storm of emotion that had been brewing within her from the moment Angelo turned on her that night broke free. She sobbed, cried, and screamed her pain to the world at large. All her emotions, all her fears, her pain, her rage, everything bottled within her let loose and she was helpless to hold it back any longer. She’d been so scared. The pain had been the likes of which she had never experienced before, but what shamed her the most was that she’d wanted to die. She’d asked to die, she’dbeggedfor them to kill her, anything to release her from the pain. But they hadn’t.
When she finally emptied enough of the emotional storm within her, she became more aware of her surroundings. Tony was trembling as he held her, his arms still locked around her tight, but she could feel the small tremors that shook his strong frame. She could feel the wetness of his tears against her skin where his face was buried against her neck. That was shocking, for sure, but it was the words he whispered over and over that had her heart swelling within her.
“I won’t let you go,bellezza mia, I can’t. I love you too damn much. Shhh, baby, please. I love you. I love you.”
Leona pushed against his chest, needing to look into his eyes. When he pulled back enough for her to do just that, tears threatened again. His expression was … ravaged. Tony was known for his poker face, his icy façade that kept anyone and everyone from knowing what he was thinking. But at this moment, bearing witness to her breakdown, his expression was completely open. Never before had she seen a man look so vulnerable.
“Tony,” she whispered, her voice rough from her emotional outburst. She lifted a shaking hand to cup the side of his face. “Stop, you have to stop.”
“Stop what, Lee?” Tony asked, pressing his own hand against hers, holding it against his cheek. “Stop holding you? Stop loving you? I’m not sure I can do that.”
Leona took a shaky breath. “I’m not sure I’m asking you to, but … maybe I should.”
Tony sighed as he leaned forward to place his forehead against hers. “Leona, you have to know how I feel about you. Hell, how I’ve always felt about you. I’ve been in love with you for so long, I don’t know any other way to be.”
She reached up with her other hand so that she held his handsome face. “How can that be? You know who I am, where I’ve come from. What I have done. How can you love someone who sold her body to others? Who took money for sex?”
The heat of shame swept across her face, and she dropped her hands, suddenly sure she was not worthy to be touching him so intimately.
