Page 97 of No One Aboard
Lila moved forward through the rain, past the two of them until her lover’s back was to her, facing her husband.
She clutched the railing for a brief moment, remembering Eileen. Had Eileen been guilty, after all?
Was it better to be guilty than inconsequential?
Lila turned, grabbed Alejandro by his shoulders, and pushed. Or perhaps Francis pulled. Perhaps her weight was enough onits own with the slippery deck. Alejandro fell forward, and on his way down his head hit one of the poles that held up the lifelines.
The sound of the impact was lost in the storm.
Alejandro lay half lidded on the deck, Lila and Francis standing over him.
She’d done it to hurt Francis, Lila told herself. But Francis hadn’t flinched, and he didn’t so much as wrinkle his nose as he bent down and eased his fallen friend to the edge of the deck. Alejandro’s body slipped over the side, unconscious, and hit the waves.
Lila looked at her husband. Then at the blank space between them. Francis dusted off his hands, kissed her on the cheek, and returned to the helm of the ship.
Her heartbeat stuttered. She exhaled.
She wiped the tears from her cheeks, unable to unglaze her eyes as she dragged her hands over and over down the front of her robe. Alejandro had made his choice.
She left her remorse to be swallowed by the storm and climbed back belowdecks to draw a bath.
Chapter 47
Tia Cameron
Call sign: Thimble
Day 10 at Sea
“Tia, I’m sorry...” Rylan whispered into the empty air between them the moment Lila had shut them in their cabin.
Tia pinched the bridge of her nose. “Don’t,” she said, not because he shouldn’t be apologizing but because if she heard his whimpering voice one more time in the next minute she feared she’d snap.
So Rylan had told them. He’d told Lila, maybe Francis too, about Tia’s plan to run away. He knew Tia was gutted over the idea she might no longer be able to leave. He knew she wouldn’t stop trying, even if Francis took them to the end of the world.
And still, he’d betrayed her.
“Why?” Tia asked him.
She heard Rylan shift from foot to foot. He sniffed. Started to answer.
She cut him short. “I guess I don’t really need to ask, do I? It’s probably the same reason you do everything. Or don’t do anything, more like.”
“T-Tia...”
Tia opened her eyes. Her brother stood before her, witheredin on himself in that way of his that always looked delicate and doll-like.
But now he just looked pathetic.
“You got too scared. Just like you got too scared to pull me out of a goddamnbomb.”
He started to cry, and she hated him. She couldn’t help it; it wasn’t fair. She couldn’t even express her feelings without Rylan buckling.
“Stop crying!” Tia told him, trying not to cry herself. She wasn’t the bad guy here.Hehad betrayedher.Hehad failed MJ.
To Tia’s bewilderment, Rylan did stop crying. He sat back on his bed as if the weight of his own shortcomings were too much for him to bear. He had his palms open to the ceiling, waving helplessly.
I’m sick of apologizing, he mouthed.
