Page 29 of The Backup Groom
That would be a big fat NO from my end.
From both of my ends, actually.
Rhubarb Ryan probably didn’t have a problem imitating a pretzel in his birthday suit because he had the most gorgeous bronze tan I’ve ever seen and a lean physique that had to be somewhere around the five-percent-body-fat range. I stopped weighing myself years ago after I was convinced my scale hated me.
I wondered what type of strict eating regimen he adhered to, because I refused to go out with a man who ate more salad than me. Obviously, that rule wouldn’t apply to my current circumstances, since my only goal was to find a husband quickly.
“The body is a temple, to be worshiped and enjoyed.” Rhubarb Ryan slowly ran his fingertips along his skin, from his pecs down to his abs, then back up to the top to start again.
What was he doing? I couldn’t tell if he was petting himself or trying to imitate a cat covering up poop in a kitty litter box. Whatever it was, he was creeping me out.
“We’ll keep that other class in mind for the future,” Stella lied, then turned to me. “Ready to get that organic juice?” She gave me a knowing smile.
We never firmed up the plan to rope this particular Ryan into going out with me, but that was obviously my cue to follow her lead.
I agreed. “You bet. I’ve been looking forward to that juice all morning.”
“I’m a juice freak,” Rhubarb Ryan said. “Do you have a favorite?”
Stella impressively rattled off a bunch of ingredients that sounded far from appetizing when mixed. “Kale, spinach, cucumber, celery, pineapple, lemon, ginger, and turmeric.Sogood.”
Seriously, I would never drink that.
Stella was really selling it well, though. She obviously had planned and done her homework because I had never heard of such a juice.
“That sounds delish,” Rhubarb Ryan said.
“Well, you’re more than welcome to join us,” Stella said right on cue. “In fact, I would love to treat you to a juice as a way of saying thank you for such a wonderful class.”
He didn’t hesitate. “This was my last class for the day. I’d be a fool to turn down your generous offer.”
“You would be!” Stella squeezed his arm. “Give us time to go home and shower and we’ll see you at Bean Me Up, Scotty in an hour.”
“That’s perfect,” Rhubarb Ryan said. “It’ll take me that much time to walk over there if I include a pit stop at McDonald’s on the way.”
I blinked and stared at his perfect body.
Thatwas his eating regimen?
I refused to believe it.
I’d never heard of a bohemian who ate fast food.
What also made little sense was why he would choose to walk.
“It’s kind of warm outside right now,” I said. “You might want to drive.”
He waved it off. “Don’t you worry about me—I’m used to walking. I’m not a fan of cars.”
It was fascinating that Rhubarb Ryan wasn’t a fan of clothes or cars, but loved nudity and McDonald’s. Luckily for patrons, restaurants had dress codes and there was no chance he would be McNaked while he ate.
Honestly, he was a little weird for my taste, but he was kind. I shouldn’t judge him because of his lifestyle. It was his life, not mine, and as long as he wasn’t breaking any laws, more power to him.
He seemed pretty laid-back, so maybe marrying for money was no big deal.
Unless he wasn’t a fan of relationships.
I guess I would find out soon enough.
