Page 90 of Men or Paws
It wasn’t like I didn’t have good foster parents, even though there were more than a few of them. Or that my childhood was horrible, even though I did keep to myself most of the time.
The truth was, my fear of abandonment didn’t rear its ugly head until after I became an adult, until after I got into a relationship and things started getting good. I always broke up with the woman before she had a chance to break up with me, before she had a chance to abandon me like my parents had done. It was like clockwork, one woman after another. It was a horrible problem I wasn’t proud of.
The tabloids even labeled me “The Hollywood Heartbreaker” at one point, something that just about made me sick.
The weird thing was, Marcello also grew up in the foster care system, but didn’t have the same problem as me, for some reason. Maybe he was stronger that I was, but he got married five years ago and was madly in love with his wife, which couldn’t have made me any happier. I was certain my turn to find the love of my life would be coming soon.
Was it Beth? Only time would tell.
“It’s basically just fear,” Marcello said, nailing it on the head. “You’re expecting a worst-case scenario, so you jump ship before it has a chance to materialize. In fact, every time you begin a relationship, I wonder how long it will last.”
“I’ll be the first one to admit, I’ve got some baggage that’s taking up space in my head,” I said. “But I’m confident I can break that pattern with Beth. It feels different this time. Seriously, she could be the one.”
“Nothing would make me happier.” Marcello squeezed my shoulder. “I’ve never seen you this pumped up about a woman before, but you still need to be careful. If you have any doubts, any inkling that you may repeat the same pattern again, just do the right thing, don’t get involved with Beth.”
Marcello was one hundred percent right.
I needed to consider Beth’s feelings and not just my own before I jumped into a relationship with her, but my gut told me I was doing the right thing.
As corny as it sounded, I could feel it deep down in my soul . . . she was the one for me.
“That’s why I love you, man,” I said. “You care about people, even someone you just met like Beth.” I slapped him on the back and then gave him a hug. “Everything is going to turn out fine, you’ll see. I appreciate your watching out for me.”
Marcello smiled. “Always.”
“Speaking of that, thanks for drying off Houdini.”
He held up his index finger. “Thatwas a one-time deal since you were running late for the meeting. You owe me.”
I laughed. “Yeah, I know. And I’m going to owe you double since I’m leaving Houdini here with you.”
Marcello jerked his head back. “What? No, no, no, no. I didn’t agree to that.”
“I’ll make it up to you—I promise. In fact, don’t eat lunch and I’ll surprise you with something when I get back.”
Marcello’s shoulders relaxed and he arched a brow. “Are you talking about what I think you’re talking about?”
“There is a one hundred percent chance of that,” I said, winking.
“Okay, I’ll let it slide this time.” Marcello grinned.
“You’re a good man. I’ll be back.” I went to the garage and grabbed the key fob to the Maserati from the key board and headed to the guesthouse.
Beth answered the door with a smile on her face and a purse on her shoulder, wearing her faded jeans and a black blouse. She looked sexy as hell, but I couldn’t pass up the opportunity for a little harmless payback after all the crap she gave me for my own wardrobe choices.
“A black blouse,” I said, wrinkling my nose like I just smelled one of Houdini’s infamous farts after he ate cheese. “How . . . unimaginative.”
Beth rolled with the punches, neither afraid nor intimidated by a little verbal sparring. “You didn’t seem to have a problem with my black bikini.” Her flirtatious smile did something to my heart.
At that moment, I knew how Superman felt.
And I wasn’t talking about the spandex.
Confident women made me weak.
They were my kryptonite.
Beth was creative, quick-witted, and captivating. The type of woman who would not be defined by her job or her relationship. She would be happy with or without me, which impressed me and scared me at the same time, since I wanted her to want me. Beth stayed true to herself, knew what she wanted, and didn’t sell herself short. There is nothing sexier than a woman with these qualities.
