Page 42 of Men or Paws
A few seconds later, Houdini lifted his leg and peed against one of the palm trees.
“As you can see, this is Houdini’s favorite place to pee and poop,” Rocco said.
Another snort slipped out.
Rocco turned toward me. “Now what?”
I shook my head. “Nothing.”
He crossed his arms, waiting for me to say something else.
I sighed. “I just thought it was kind of cute, you know, Captain Clapton saying the words peeandpoop in the same sentence.”
Rocco placed his hands on his hips. “Are you flirting with me?”
“Do you really think the words peeand poop get my motor running?” I asked.
“You never know.”
“Give me a break,” I said. “I just didn’t expect to hear that coming out of your mouth, that’s all.”
“Pee and poop are normal, everyday words,” Rocco said. “What do you prefer I say? Defecate and urinate? They don’t roll off the tongue as smoothly.”
“True—I’ll give you that much,” I said. “We could always try out a few expressions and see what works best for you. Let me hear you saynumber twoandtinkle.” I tried to keep a straight face, but it wasn’t easy since acting wasn’t my profession.
“Dream on,” Rocco said.
I couldn’t help laughing again.
“Scat, excrement, muck . . . you are speaking my language, people!” An older man popped his head over the property wall and scared the crap out of me.
Now that I thought about it, crap was a very useful word.
Rocco gestured to the man. “Beth, meet Douglas, my neighbor. He’ll talk your ear off about dung or whatever you want to call it. He was a zookeeper at the San Diego Zoo for over forty years.”
“It was a shitty job, but someone had to do it.” Douglas chuckled and tipped his khaki-colored, wide-brimmed safari hat in my direction. “Pleased to meet you, young lady.”
I stepped closer to him and smiled. “Nice to meet you, as well.”
If I had to guess, I would say he was around eighty years old, maybe eighty-five. Which made me wonder how he was able to prop himself up above the wall since it must have been seven or eight feet tall.
“Forty years is a long time at the same job,” I said. “You obviously love animals.”
Douglas’ eyes sparkled with kindness. “I love them dearly, especially elephants. Did you know an elephant can eat three to four hundred pounds of food a day? Sometimes more.”
I smirked. “Sounds like me when I’m around pizza.”
Douglas laughed. “Good one.”
The surprising part was when Rocco laughed again.
He stopped when he saw me staring in amazement. “What?”
I shrugged. “What what?”
Nothing like an intelligent conversation between two adults.
“I’m never wrong with first impressions, and she’s not like the others at all,” Douglas said to Rocco as he gestured to me. “I can tell already.”
