Page 108 of Dead Set on You
It pisses me off.
He can’t Vela me now.
“Don’t apologize. Don’t pity me,” I whisper as pain, physical and emotional and foundational, explodes everywhere. The hospital corridor flashes around me on all sides.
I blink, willing it all to still.
Only it feels like I’m suffocating.
I turn away from him, needing to steady myself.
I stare right at the door. I need to go in and find a way to stop her.
Another flare of pain sends bursts of white flashing behind my eyes. I gasp, almost doubling over.
I think I’m dying.
“Evie?”
I press the heels of my palms into my eyes, where the pressure threatens to burst, and grind my teeth against it.
I thought I’d be more prepared.
“Talk to me,” Rafael pleads.
“Please. Go, Rafael,” I say hoarsely. “There’s nothing you can do.”
Rafael closes in. “I’m not going anywhere.”
His refusal reverberates through me, making me feel even more unhinged.
I glare at him. “It’s not a request, Rafael!” I swipe furiously at the tears running down my cheeks.
“I’m not leaving you alone.” His voice is steady, resolute.
I drop my palms to my sides and curl them into my dress. He’s bullheaded until the bitter end, but so am I.
I breathe past the hurricane of pain sweeping through, separating me molecule by molecule, and meet his gaze as I say, “It’sbetter on my own, because I can count on myself more than I could ever count on you.”
He opens his mouth, but I don’t hear what he says, because an invisible force slams into my middle, deep and hard, knocking me backward.
And I’m falling down, down, down into nothingness, hoping Rafael didn’t believe a single word of my lies.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINENOW(ISH)
I’m with Annie.
We’re sitting on a bench overlooking Lake Michigan. It’s a warm day, and the sun glimmers across the lake. A breeze tugs at our hair. Hers is the same pale yellow I remember, tied into a ponytail. Mine hangs around my shoulders in dyed light-brown strands.
“Isn’t this amazing?” Annie’s voice is a balm. I stare at her, unsure if I should hug her or kiss her or both.
“It’s themostamazing,” I say, wondering if this is a dream or something more permanent.
A gust of summer-scented wind breezes over us. Annie laughs as she clutches her daisy dress between her knees to keep it against her. I curl my hair behind my ears, failing miserably to keep it from flying everywhere.
“You and that dress.” I shake my head, not at all surprised that she still wears it.
“It’s the best, isn’t it?” Annie smiles so big it crinkles her face as she leans back onto the bench with a sigh. The beach is empty save for an old couple strolling down the boardwalk. A manwalking his dog in the distance. And a woman sitting on the bench beside ours, her face buried in a book.
