Page 31 of Fractured Souls
Chapter 9
Cam
Soum... don’t think I’m into dudes.
Or at least, not this one.
Moaning with gold-star enthusiasm, he sucks my cock. Ten out of ten for technique. It feels great, don’t get me wrong. Max clearly knows what he’s doing. It’s just, I don’t know. It’s hard to stay focused. It’s hard to stay, well, hard in this moment. It’s awkward and kind of weird, but I don’t hate it. I mean, it’s a mouth on my dick. I really can’t complain.
The problem is that there’s no heat behind it. No zing. The electricity with Bowen caught me off guard. It was just a brush of his lips, his body pressed to mine, and I felt crazed with need. The way his soft brown eyes looked at me, it drove me crazy. His red pouty lips, the way they looked swollen after kissing . . . likeerotic chapstick. I close my eyes and pretend I’m there. Home. Home with Bo, kiss drunk and melting into my body.
“Oh—fuuck.”
“Yeah, baby?” My eyes pop open and I look at him. He hits me with a smile before taking me in his mouth again with a moan. I try to shut him out and just think back to that night—Bo’s kisses altered my entire world. The way he rolled his hips against me . . . It was unreal. I want to know how he tastes, how he’d respond with my head between his thighs. Would he taste as sweet as the cherry bodywash he uses? What would have happened if I’d rolled him under me, slid his pants down, and just lost myself inside him?
Does he like it rough or gentle? Has he even been with anyone before? I can’t remember any boyfriends ever. Did he just not introduce me? And if so, why? And why does that thought piss me off?
I have no right to feel any jealousy. I’ve slept my way across Upstate New York for the better part of my adult life, and just one thought of Bo with someone—like he may be now—is making my guts clench.
Ignoring that thought, I try and lose myself again.
I just . . . can’t. I can’t stop the images as they twine with the feeling of Max sucking me. So I don’t fight it; I give in. I think about what it would be like, my fingers laced around his throat, forcing his gaze onto mine while I drive inside his sweet body. I want to hear him. I want it to be so good he’s shaking. I want him begging to come while falling apart at the seams. I’d drink in every whimper and moan that leaves his pretty lips. “Oh fuck, I’m coming.”
The pleasure slaps me, but wanes so fast as I open my eyes and watch this man grin up at me while licking the crown of my swollen cock, desire burning bright in his warm chocolate eyes. They’re a few shades lighter than Bo’s.
This is all wrong.
Oh shit, he’s going to want a return, right? I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I am a dick. I always make sure to give . . . honestly, I’m usually the one giving. I don’t mind, I love pleasuring my partners. I’m an asshole. I shouldn’t have done this. It’s not fair to him. What am I doing? Fuck. “Relax.”
Max stands, wiping his mouth, then he shakes his head.
“What?”
Ignoring me he walks out of the room, leaving me with my pants around my ankles. Slowly I pull them on. I just want to leave. Coming back into the room, Max grabs his own underwear and slips them on.
“You don’t want me to—”
“You don’t want to, and you’re not my only option. Relax.” He smiles at me genuinely.
“Are you sure?”
“Oh, I’m sure.” He tsks. “Straights and their experiments.” He shakes his head. “I’m alright.”
“That’s not—”
“You barely got hard until you shut your eyes. Dream about a nice girl with big tits?”No. My face flushes. I stay silent, though. He’s giving me an out and I’m about to take it. “I did have fun. You’re sweet. Like a puppy dog.” Max shrugs, patting my cheek. “You have a nice cock. It wasn’t a hardship.”
“Oh um, thank you.”
“Whoever you were thinking about, though. Go find her. Figure your shit out.”
Not her.
Him.
Maybe the only him. Does that even make sense? How could I not be into this but with Bo the connection had been instant? This guy is objectively gorgeous, but it feels so wrong. Am Ieven attracted to him? He is attractive, but I don’t think I am. “Thanks.”
“I didn’t mind sucking your dick but I would like you to leave now.”Okay. He's giving you an out. Take it!
