Page 119 of Sweet Venom
All this time, I thought Jude mourned his mother because she was his light in the darkness, but what Preston just revealed makes me question something.
Does he feel a toxic attachment to her like I do with Mama?
24
JUDE
Ihad every intention of letting Violet go.
Not because of Julian’s or Kane’s threats. I couldn’t give two fucks about those, and they certainly don’t influence my actions.
It’s because of something deeper.
Because she chose death to fucking escape me.
Violet preferred to take an experimental drug that had a high percentage chance of killing her just so she could have another life away from me.
She didn’t attempt suicide like I was led to believe that day she was attacked, but she still chose death over me.
A coma.
Leaving the one person she deeply cares about, Dahlia, and risking never opening her eyes again.
Just to escape me.
For that reason, I kept my distance after she woke up. I avoided her, even—which was difficult, considering we live in the same town and attend the same college.
During the time I stayed in the shadows, I indulged in my favorite habit.
Murder.
I killed more people in a couple of weeks than I normallydid in a month, enabling Preston’s mania in the process. But then again, I couldn’t control myself, let alone help rein him in.
We did it for Vencor instead of my vendetta because I’m trying to prolong it. I’m down to only three names on my list.
Three.
And then I’ll have no purpose.
Mom will still be gone, and there’ll be…nothing.
Maybe that’s why I came back into Violet’s life. Maybe it’s because I saw her talking to Preston and having lunches with Kane and Dahlia and hated that my friends got her smile, and I didn’t.
Maybe it’s because I saw her by the arena and was enraged that she might have her sights on someone on the team.
Not sure what the actual reason is, but I fell so easily back into old habits. It’s almost as if I never stopped.
Like right now.
I put in the code to her penthouse and walk in.
And yes, I have the code. Of course I do.
She won’t know how I have it, though.
So, yes, I’m back, even though I truly intended to let her go.
Just kidding.
