Page 39 of Duchess in Disguise
“There is no better blessing to a gentleman than knowing he was there when he was needed. It was my pleasure,” Richard replied coyly.
Isobel giggled, and the walk continued, both of them casually discussing the most mundane topics. This was the most Isobel had spoken to someone who was not her sibling. It was truly strange how quickly she had adapted to the duke’s presence.
He glanced at her, something unreadable in his expression. After a few moments, he spoke up.
“I have a question for you.”
“I can only hope I have an answer,” she teased with a smile, but upon noticing his serious expression, she said, “You may ask whatever you wish.”
“You said before that you planned to become a nun after this business with your sister is resolved. I find myself... curious about that decision.”
Isobel felt her earlier contentment begin to waver. “It seems the most sensible choice.”
“Does it?” Richard pressed gently. “You have a family who loves you in Scotland. What about your siblings? Surely they could help you make a good match if you wished it.”
“I do not wish it,” Isobel said, more sharply than she intended. She took a breath, trying to moderate her tone. “They are all married and are busy with their families. I do not wish to burden them, and I have no desire to marry an Englishman.”
“Any Englishman?” There was something odd in Richard's voice, almost offended. “That seems rather... encompassing.”
Isobel was quiet for a long moment, wrestling with whether to tell him. But after what they had shared, after the intimacies they had explored, was honesty truly too difficult to offer?
“I had a London Season,” she began quietly. “Three years ago, when I was twenty. My siblings thought it would be good for me, an opportunity to see more of the world beyond Scotland. And I...” She laughed bitterly. “I was excited, foolish girl that I was. I thought it would be an adventure.”
Richard said nothing, simply listened, and somehow that made it easier to continue.
“The ton did not appreciate my Scottish upbringing. I was too bold, too direct, too... uncultured for their refined tastes. The ladies whispered about me behind their fans, and the gentlemen...” Her hands tightened on his arm. “One gentleman in particular approached me with compliments and an ulterior motive.”
“What happened?” Richard's voice was very quiet.
“He approached me at a ball when I had slipped into the garden for some fresh air and showered me with compliments. I told him I was not interested, and he grabbed me and… tried to kiss me.” Isobel felt her face heat with a mixture of satisfaction and anger at the memory. “I struck him in the face with my fist. I think I might have broken his nose.”
Richard had gone very still beside her, and when Isobel glanced at him, she saw fury etched into every line of his face. Then he seemed to comprehend her last two statements, and he grinned,
“Good.”
“He made a huge fuss about it,” she continued, casually. “And I thought it was not going to be a problem. But the next day, there were rumors about me spreading on gossip sheets, claiming that I had tried to trap him into marriage, that when he refused me, I had flown into a violent rage. That I was unstable, dangerous, unmarriageable.”
“That is absurd,” Richard said hotly. “Anyone who knew you –”
“But they did not know me,” Isobel interrupted. “That was the problem. I was a stranger, a Scottish outsider, and he was the charming heir to an earldom. Who do you think society believed?”
Richard was silent, and Isobel knew he understood the answer.
“He even dared to suggest that I would come crawling back to him, begging him to save my reputation by marrying me despite my 'violent tendencies,'” Isobel continued, disgust clear in her voice. “As though I would ever willingly bind myself to such a man.”
“What did you do?”
“I went home to Scotland and swore I would never attend another society function again. And I have not. My siblings understood – they were furious on my behalf. My sisters wanted to fix it by tackling everyone involved, and my brother, Graham, even wanted to challenge the man to a duel, but I convinced him it was not worth it.” She looked up at Richard. “That is why I decided to join a convent. At least there, I would be free from theexpectations and judgment of English society. Free from men who think they can take what they want simply because they have a title and charm.”
Richard understood where she stood and what had caused her to arrive at the decision she had claimed. However, the part of him that had grown strangely attached to her ached at the thought of being just another face in a group that she fiercely abhorred.
Although he was not the one who endured all that she had and therefore had no say in the decisions she had taken, he couldn’t help but selfishly wonder where her choices would leave him.
‘Do you hate me too? As an Englishman?’he wanted to ask.
After a moment, he made up his mind to ask, turning her as his lips parted to call her name.
But the voice that hit the air was not his own.
