Page 16 of Change the Plan
“Because there’s only two alphas in a pack, and I don’t want the next one to be my own kid.”
His quiet “Fuck,” is barely audible through the phone.
“I don’t need to hear how much I’ve fucked up.”
“I wasn’t going to tell you that. I’msurprised. I’ve been wondering why the hell you would put up with that fucking kid for so long, now it makes sense. Is she pregnant, then?”
“Ellie? No. Not yet. I didn’t want there to be any risk at all of history repeating itself. I couldn’t think of another way.”
“And you’re asking me how I didn’t kill you.” His chuckle is a deep rumble through the phone. Thisishis kind of humour, after all.
“I feel like a monster,” I admit.
“Don’t.” His voice is stern, decisive. “We are the way we are by nature.”
I think back to the moment I had Benji up against the wall, my wolf snarling in my head. “I’ve never felt that level of aggression before today. I thought I would be able to get through it given how you and I dealt with it for so long. Now I’m not so sure.”
“You used your bark on him?”
“Of course.”
“That will help. There’s usually an incident before things come to a head. I doubt he will attack you if you avoid confrontation as much as possible. How much did you pay him?”
I shake my head. I don’t expect anything else than for my father to be thinking two steps ahead.
“A million a year, NZD. Another three when it ends,ifhe goes quietly.”
“That’s a bargain, given what it’s for.” He’s being serious. “You couldn’t pay me enough to deal with it, if I had the choice.” He’s silent for a moment. ”Your replacement arrived just last month. I knew it was happening as soon as Alex went into labour unexpectedly in the middle of a pack meeting. Out came an alpha — a girl. So I have thirteen years to enjoy my peace before the shit storm starts for me all over again.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is. And as long as it’s not my kid, I don’t care. I’ll force the family out of the pack when the time comes, and then the process will start again. Another alpha will need to be born.”
“The pack’s never getting rid of you, huh?”
“Only over my dead body. And you know your mother would have something to say about that, too.”
I take a deep breath, exhaling slowly. We’re both quiet for a moment.
“Do you remember your thirteenth birthday?” Dad asks.
Thirteen candles on an ice cream cake, the scent of the ocean and summer and sunscreen drifting through the open windows. Lacey telling me to make a wish, Seth bouncing in his seat, and Mom’s stricken face. Ellie, only nine at the time, looking confused as I blew out the candles through tears, knowing full-well that my wish would never come true. Dad pulling me outside and into his arms, both of us holding on for dear life.
A promise whispered into the top of my head. “I won’t stop loving you, Son. No matter what our wolves do. You’ll still be my boy.”
“Yeah,” I answer.
“I know it didn’t seem like I kept my promise, but I want you to know that I did.”
“I know, Dad. I always knew.”
Ellie is waitingfor me when I return home, relief clear in her brown eyes. She takes me by the hand and leads me to the couch. Exhausted, I lay my head in her lap. She strokes my hair and whispers, “I’m proud of you,” in benediction.
CHAPTER EIGHT
ELLIE
If the first sign that I’m finally ovulating is the urge to dig out my barely-used vibrator — I haven’t had much need for it in the past two and a half years, not when I have a wolf mate with a seemingly endless sex drive and a love for going down on me — the confirmation comes barely an hour later as I’m reading on the couch when Van steps through the front door.
