Page 99 of Plentywood
“The notes, right?” she asked, filling in what I’d deemed too personal to reveal to her. “Those goddamned notes and the way he keeps his house a shrine to Mark? Is that what you’re on about?”
“It’s weird, Agnes,” I said, feeling horrible when I said the words out loud.
“You don’t fucking say?” she guffawed. “It’s creepy as fuck, is what it is.”
“You know about the notes?”
“I went over to his house and fed him for a month after Mark passed. I saw the notes and his incessant need to keep every little tchotchke he owned lined up just so,” she said. “I’m just guessing here, but I’m betting he was trying to keep himself from crackin’ up.”
“When were you last there?” I asked.
“At least a year or more ago,” she confirmed.
“Nothing’s changed,” I said. Agnes shook her head in sympathy. “He still has Mark’s toothbrush in a paperDixie Cup, Agnes. The cup is half-full of two-year-old water that he keeps adding to as it evaporates.”
“Jesus!” she whispered. “Seriously?”
I nodded. Something I hadn’t seen from Agnes overcame her face. I watched her face crumble as her lips quivered. Her eyes welled up, too. She appeared heartbroken by my news.
“You okay?” I asked, reaching across my desk.
“Hunter hasn’t been to work in a week,” she revealed. “No one has seen him and now, after hearing this shit, I’m worried about him again.”
Her news update was like a bomb exploding in my heart. I was angry and disappointed by what had happened between us. And like any other person in a love squabble or suffering from break-up hurt, I wanted Hunt to suffer a little. It’s natural to have those thoughts, but now I was worried too.
“And Jill?” Agnes shook her head. “He’s not even eating at the diner?” I questioned.
“He won’t return Jill’s calls and he doesn’t come to town to eat the food she’s been leaving for him at the Sheriff’s office,” shestated. “Not that he’s going into the Sheriff’s office. I even had Charlie go check on him, but Hunter won’t answer the door.”
Now I was bordering on frantic. I loved Hunter. I believed he loved me too, but he seemed inflexible toward change, and I couldn’t go back to being secondary in a relationship. If he continued to hole up in his house without at least reaching out and saying he would try to work on things, on us, then I couldn’t compromise my position. But he hadn’t reached out to me and now I wanted to compromise, worrying that he didn’t feel the same way about us as I had.
“I won’t be another Charlie to him,” I confessed. “I saw what his pain did to Charlie, Agnes. I will not allow him to do that to me.”
“You’re wise, Ben, but Charlie is not you,” she corrected. “I love my grandson, but he’s a fuck-up. I knew Hunt would shit on Charlie. Hell, Charlie knew Hunt would shit on him,” she added. “But Charlie took just as much advantage of Hunter as Hunter did of Charlie.”
“That’s harsh,” I said.
“It’s the truth,” she replied. “Charlie obsessed over Hunt. He did and has his entire life. And this is going to sound like a horrible thing to say about my grandson, but he used Mark’s death to worm his way into Hunter’s life.”
“Yikes, Agnes.”
“He was just as fucked-up a person in his life as Hunt was after Mark died. I warned him. I threatened him. He listened to nothing and no one and headed straight for Hunt and into a disaster.”
“And I feel like I am the next man that should heed the warning signs, Agnes,” I said. “I can’t be another casualty to Hunt’s pain.” I leaned closer and whispered, even though we were alone in the office. “I’m probably leaving in five months, anyway.”
Agnes’s face registered shock and anger, but instead of letting loose with her impressive repertoire of curse words, she stood and walked across the room, facing the wall for a few moments before turning back to me. “You can’t do that, Ben,” she stated. “You just can’t do that. You can’t because of Hunter, and you can’t because of this town. You were sent here to save us, son.”
I frowned, pinching my mouth, and waved her off as a crazy woman. “That is nuts. I have my own ghosts, Agnes. And I’ll continue to support the town through my trust whether or not I’m here,” I said. “I have no reason to stay. Plentywood will survive just fine.”
She hurried back to my desk and leaned over me, panic written on her face. “It’s not just your money, son. This town needs your heart,” she stressed, grabbing my hands. “Mark and Hunt were the heart of this town, and I was certain we were fucked until you showed up. Hunt needs you. Plentywood needs you.Ineed you!”
“I cannot be Mark,” I protested.
“But youcanbe Ben. This town adores you, son. True, Hunt is a fucking mess right now, but he loves you. He absolutely loves you, Ben. And that must count for something, right?”
“I just don’t know,” I said. “I’m afraid.”
“Of what?” she asked. “Afraid that you’ll regret leaving a place that loves you? Needs you? Afraid that Hunt is your true destiny?” she pushed, sitting down again and pleading with me. “Heis why you came here, Ben. I believe it with all my heart. That boy needs astrongerboy. Thatbrokenboy needs a boy smart enough to love him through this.Youare that boy.”
